The Vending Machine That Changed My Life

It was 1970 and I was a teenage boy with a point to prove to the world. "I was young and free!" I was a rebel in my own mind. A local bad boy. The hippy movement was in full swing and I was embracing it with both arms wide open. It was my time to shine. I had the most awesome car and the style to go with it. Nobody could stop me. (or so I thought)

My dad was a gambler and a shrewd trading man. We moved around from place to place a lot. Once we moved because pops lost our house in a card game. One day he came home with a sky blue 1970 Ford XL. It was a gift for mom, most likely his attempt to make things right after he lost our house. Since I was a mama's boy, she allowed me to drive the car around town. I can still remember it like was only yesterday. Me cruising through town with my long, hippy hair blowing in the wind. Creedence Clearwater on the radio just as loud as it would go. All eyes on me!

Since I'm being honest, I had been a some trouble here and there. Skipping school, speeding tickets, being rowdy and the occasional fight are just a few of the reasons. To make a long story short, I was not exactly a stranger to the local police. Although I had never done anything terribly wrong they always had an eye out for me. Out running them was one of my favorite things to do. Of course one night when I went home, I found them standing on the front porch with Pops waiting for me. It was a small town after all.

After that night I wasn't allowed to drive the car anymore. If I went any where, I had to hoof it. Walking didn't go over very well with me. It really cramped my style and well, the ladies just didn't look at a guy the same way if he was on foot. After walking around town one Summer afternoon, I was just about as thirsty as you could imagine. I stopped at a drug store in town that sold fountain drinks and ice cream floats. I was sitting at the counter getting ready to order my drink when my brother came strolling in. Now, me and my brother was usually the best of friends. But on this particular day he had his arm around my favorite girl in town. One thing led to another and we got thrown out of the store and Pops was sent a hefty repair bill. We didn't get in trouble because mom and dad hurried to town and took care of everything. They was always chasing us boys around and cleaning up our messes. As teenagers we really put them through a lot and somehow they kept on loving us in spite of it all.

Since I couldn't get my cold fountain drink and I wasn't exactly ready to go home and face the parents, I just kept walking. It was at this time that I passed the vending machine that would change my life in a very awkward way. Just knowing that this wonderful machine was filled with ice cold drinks drew me to it like a moth to a flame. I reached into my pocket for a dime. (can you believe that in 1970 a coke only costed ten cents!) This is when the little devil on my shoulder spoke to me. "Why pay a whole dime when you can get it for free!?" Every kid in town knew how to reach up inside of the machine and jiggle a free drink out.

I looked around to see if anyone was watching and then I went to work. I got down on my hands and knees, the pavement was burning hot. Slipped my hand into the machine and reached up as far as I could. I was shoulder deep inside and could feel a icy cold soda on my finger tips. I jiggled and pried until I felt it fall loose. It was at this moment that I was stricken with horror. MY ARM WAS STUCK! I pulled and pulled until my arm was raw and hurting. I sit there for well over thirty minutes trying to free myself. A car passed and slowed down to see what was going on. I kept my head down just hoping that they didn't recognize me. Now I was really desperate, I yanked my arm so hard that I felt something pop and a sharp pain ran from my shoulder to my fingers. I didn't care if I had to rip my arm off, I had to get loose! Wouldn't you know it, the police rolled right up.

He didn't immediately get out of his car, I could hear him laughing. Finally he walked over to me, still chuckling "Are ya thirsty boy!" I refused to respond. "Looks like you got yourself in a dinkydoo!" Humiliation and embarrassment covered me as another officer arrived. They both stood there laughing at my situation. To make matters worse one of them pointed to a dime laying on the ground just inches away from me. They let me sit there trapped while they joked and laughed. They knew that it was the best form of punishment that they could give me. I had never felt so graceless in my life. Finally one told the other "go get this boys daddy."

By now about ten people stood gathered around starring at my misery. I could hear them whispering and giggling. I thought that I was the coolest guy in the whole town. Now here I am with my arm stuck inside of this machine and my pops just pulled up.

Pop, crack, pow, I pictured him looking like a Karate master, swinging his belt around and cracking it in the air. I heard some girls laughing "look his dad's here!" someone else said "he's gonna give it to him good!" My reputation in this town was over. At this very moment every ounce of pride and dignity that I had melted straight into the pavement. Right there, in front of everyone that I knew with my arm stuck in a vending machine, my Pops gave me a good, old fashioned whipping. But that wasn't where the most embarrassing day of my life ended.

The Fire Department ended up having to come out and assist in getting my arm unstuck. By now it seemed like most of the town had came to watch. I was feeling no bigger than a little slug laying there on the pavement.

Finally, after nearly an hour I was free. The ride home with Pops was the most uncomfortable. He didn't say a single word. When we got home, mom was in the kitchen preparing dinner and she didn't even act like she knew what had just unfolded. Pops sit down in his chair and picked up a paper and glared at it. Had I just entered the twilight zone? What in the world was going on here? I went upstairs to clean up for dinner and try to wash away some of the humiliation that still lingered.

Up until now, like most kids my age, I was against the war taking place in Vietnam. I'm not sure why, I suppose it was because most everyone else that I knew was against it. That all changed at the dinner table that night. My dad informed me that he had made a deal with the police (remember I said that he was a gambler and a shrewd trading man). In exchange for them not pressing charges on me he told them that I would enlist in the army. This wasn't what he wanted to do but what he felt like he needed to do to save me. It was his way of making a man out of a destructive young boy.

That vending machine really did change my life and so did my Pops. Sometimes I guess that the most humiliating and uncomfortable situations in life are simply preparing us for what comes next.

Embrace your humiliation and most of all, learn from it. No regrets.