The Highs and Lows of Gambling

The potential for significant wins is one of gambling's key allures. Many people continue to play card games, spin the roulette wheel, or place sports bets because of the chance to win a large sum of money. Gamblers seek a natural high from the thrill of anticipation, the outcome developing, and the satisfaction of winning.

Some people get greater highs from gambling than just from monetary gains. Whether it's the social ambiance of a casino or the challenge of learning a new game, many gamblers love the activity. Gambling can also have a positive side by fostering a sense of solidarity via shared excitement.

People do win big and, for the very few out there, have made a living over this game of chance. But sadly, most people don't leave the floors of the casino with this feeling. Instead, they leave destroyed, angry even, swearing that one day they'll return to take the casino for all it's worth.

These highs, and the consequent lows, are how people, like myself, despite swearing that they'll never play again, always come back for "the last time." I'm an addict. This is my story.

It was a normal day. My client just sent over their final payment, and I felt great. I can't remember the events leading up to it, but I remembered seeing an ad about a gambling site and thought, "Hey, this seems fun. Let's take a shot at it!"

So I went and put in about the equivalent of $10 USD in my local currency and started playing slots. I was excited. Never in my life have I tried to gamble with actual money. After 5 minutes, it was gone. I laughed it off and said to myself that it was fun, but I was never going to do it again. But I did. Over and over again.

Maybe it's because I don't know when to quit, or maybe because I was chasing losses that I probably shouldn't have. Either way, I lost again and again and again. After a few more losses, this was it, I told myself, this is the last time I'll ever spend money gambling again. By this point, I'd already put in about $300 USD; for a college student whose main source of income was freelancing, that was a lot. In less than a month, I've spent more gambling than I've ever spent on myself in that amount of time.

But I relapsed. I put in what was supposed to be the last $10 USD I'll ever put in and played. I won. BIG. Those last $10 dollars turned into more than $200 USD at their highest. I was elated. I've never won anything this big before. That feeling of ecstasy was something else. I just kept playing. And playing. And playing. Praying for one more big payout and promising never to play again if it happens. But It never did. That $200 USD turned into $150 USD, then $50 USD, and finally zero. In a span of just 3 hours, I went from being the happiest man on earth to what I can only describe as what you feel when going through a bad breakup. I was crushed. I had lost AGAIN.

This cycle continued for three more months. Winning big but never getting the chance to spend it on something other than gambling. Feeling the euphoric highs only to be kicked down again and again. This story is the product of the aftermath of one of those cycles.

Even though I feel broken, writing this made me realize that I'm finally, after four months of letting this take over my life, I'm finally ready. I'm ready to move on and swear off gambling for good.

It just sunk in all of a sudden. There are no shortcuts to life. Everything takes time, and when you decide to circumvent the natural order of things, life will get you every time.

For anyone out there who wants to try gambling just for fun, don't. You WILL get addicted, and it WILL ruin your life. Stay away. Learn from my experience.