Orange Hi-C and A Coffee

I met him just over 2 years ago. My boss was certain that we would be perfect for one another. I was involved with someone else at the time; nobody important, nobody who will get a chapter, but nonetheless.....

He was 27.

But me? Well....I was more than a decade older than him.

He came into my work several times a week, as we work in the same industry. He was cute, in the way that you'd say someone much younger than you is cute. He reminded me of Russel from Up, and he had a Golden Retriever.

Our first date was a blind date. I had never been on a blind date before. I was given nothing but a location, time, and told what he would be wearing. I was nervous, and excited. I didn't know it was going to be Russel.

Russel isn't his real name, but it is his name for this chapter.

I never considered myself to be the "cougar" type. Somewhere between 32-35, I made a switch. One day I was attracted to pretty boys, with young faces, and clean cut. The next morning, I woke up, and I found that I was attracted to salt & pepper, lined faced men, who made reservations for dates.

A younger man was never what I wanted; I liked men who were at least 5-10 years my senior.

But Russel was incredibly sweet. He was untarnished by life. He held no hatred towards women, and he wasn't jaded. It is REALLY hard to find that in men over 30.

It's a good thing he was 27.

We had our coffee, he walked me to my car, and he opened my car door. He text me later that night, and told me he really wanted to see me again.

I know, I know... he didn't CALL. Rule #1 was broken, but I think he had a valid excuse.

Russel is deaf.

Russel is def, but he can read lips, and he can talk.

He reminded me of Shaun.

But a younger version of Shaun, who was not only still alive, but who also wasn't a single parent, wasn't stressed out, who loved and embraced the fact that he was deaf. Where Shaun fought hard to break the stereotypes; Russel worked with deaf kids, at the Wisconsin School for the Deaf, and he wanted the people in his life to use ASL.

But this story isn't about comparing the two. I have loved them both immensely, but in very different ways.

I realized something: I didn't want to be the one who jaded him, the one who ruined him.

Russel knew right away that we weren't going to be a couple. Though, he did try hard. He came to my work, brought me flowers, and asked me on a second date.

We went to lunch that day.

But I had to remind myself-

He is 27.

And me? Well........ I'm NOT.

We had a wonderful time, and we went on to spend a bit of time together here and there, but we never got serious.

It was me. I was the problem. I wouldn't allow him to get close to me, the way he desperately tried to do.

Because he was 27.... And me?

Well.....you know.

More than a year had passed since our first date, and it had been more than 6 months since I last saw him, or text him. I was sitting on the beach, absorbed in myself, my family, and waiting for fireworks to start.

I had a tap on my shoulder, but I ignored it. My kids like playing the "tap on your opposite shoulder, and pretend they did nothing" game.

Then out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone come around and bend down in front of me.

He was nothing like I remembered him.

He was 29.

But me, well, you know..... when the age starts with a 4, we don't like to talk about it.

He smiled. He waved. He realized I was with my family.

And he disappeared.

It happened so quickly, that I started to question if it was real.

I picked up my phone and immediately text:

"I'll text you tomorrow."

Only I didn't wait until tomorrow. I laid in bed, wondering why I stopped talking to someone who wasn't jaded, and held no hatred... Someone who always made me feel care-free, happy, and lighter.

We talked about where we were both at. I told him I had a doctor's appointment the next day, and that I didn't want to drive all the way out to Janesville.

He asked if he could pick me up.

And pick me up, he did.

The entire car ride out, I remembered why I loved spending time with him so much. The windows were down, the Jackson 5 played loudly, and we laughed the whole afternoon.

He made me forget that, well, I wasn't 29.....

-But he still was.

When I got out of my appointment and done with bloodwork; I went back to his car.

There was an orange Hi-C and my favorite Starbucks drink.

"What is this?" I smiled as I asked, because I already knew. He paid attention to the smallest details....

......and when you're not jaded, you don't mind doing the small stuff that makes all the difference.

"You like to have Orange Hi-C from McDonald's after you get bloodwork."

I guess the coffee was just for good measure. A reminder of our first blind date together.