Confessions logo

Here We Go. Another Boring Bio

But it's my bio and I cry if I want to.

By Rene Volpi Published 8 months ago Updated 8 months ago 3 min read
4
Here We Go. Another Boring Bio
Photo by Jonathan Mabey on Unsplash

1. I'm Rene. This is the first time I've ever written a bio. 🤔 Italo-Argentine and never lost the accent, some say it's better that I haven't.

2. My story is a sad one. First, I was born crying, which wasn't a great start, and then they spanked me to make sure. 😆 Some obstetrician!

3. Later on, I got beat up for telling my schoolmates I like to write poetry. I was good at it and wasn't about to quit because of their bullying, so I started swinging back when the time was right. They never bothered me again. ✍️💪

4. I was raised in Argentina but I can't tango, don't drink yerba mate, and sure as hell I can't ride a fast horse. Argentinian horses don't play. 😎 Growing up by the beach, I enjoyed the view of some magnificent South Atlantic waves, the envy of any surfer who heard about them. Me? I rode them from far out all the way to the sand, never bothered with a board. Too heavy and clumsy to carry. And there are always stickin' out somewhere, looking for that unsuspecting victim, and its poor eye. Boing! Oops, sorry about that eye. Good thing you have 2.

5. Languages I speak a few, 5 total but since I don't practice them constantly, I'm losing touch with them. I better start calling all my foreign friends long-distance. Collect, of course. 😂 It's funny when you're having a convo with one of them and in the middle of it, you get a memory lapse moment and go ... what's that word I'm trying to say? LOL

6. I picked them up living in faraway lands in which I had to adapt to survive and that included speaking their language. I recommend that to anyone reading this; if you're not constrained by age, finances, or a jealous partner. If you want real adventure, pack your backpack and hit the road. Kerouac and friends wrote all about it. I always had a history of running away from home, since a very young age. And the cops had the same history of bringing me back. It was addictive, I swear. So, of course, I would do it every time I could. You'd meet fascinating characters, hippies and beach bums; poets and the ubiquitous bohemian types, and all their friends. My parents were blue in the face trying to instruct me to stop doing it because everybody was worried. 'Yeah, right', I thought to myself. And off I went again.

By Stéphane Juban on Unsplash

7. I went to lots of schools in different countries (Dad's foreign jobs), and barely attended college but hey, I learned more everywhere else. Fact! 😂 Right now I've filled up 3 passports to the maximum number of entry ports. Tonle Sap, in Cambodia, was the most exciting place I've ever been and where I had the most unforgettable experiences.

8. When I became a photojournalist, it's when my life turned serious. I covered peace and I covered war. The latter left me with a profound and empirical knowledge of the human condition. Except for a few essays here and there, I still can't write about it. It's the price one pays. Maybe in a few more years?

9. I write off the cuff, just like I'm doing here. I'm a "pantser", right? 🤗 I tried structured writing, with a format and a schedule and my pieces didn't have the same feel. The trash bin was a good landing place. I'm essentially a storyteller (what else, right?), but I indulge in historical fiction, micro-fiction, short stories, and whatever any given evening by the shore inspires.

10. I'm one essay away from a Pulitzer win 🎉🍾and one chapter away from a Nobel 🥳. My mum agrees wholeheartedly. So, who am I to argue?

By Dave on Unsplash

SecretsTeenage yearsHumanityChildhood
4

About the Creator

Rene Volpi

I'm from Italy and write every day. Being a storyteller by nature, I've entertained (and annoyed) people with my "expositions" since I was a child, showing everyone my primitive drawings, doodles, and poems. Still do! Leave me a comment :)

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.