The Epic of Love Going Through Heartbreak

There is no exact definition for it because it is not a science. It is a feeling, it is essence, it is a dream; everything exists but nothing is palpable; it makes you feel like nothing, and yet it is vague and still so unknown to most of us.

Everyone talks about love, but not everyone knows true love. True love is a force more than an emotion; it is like a universal law, probably the most powerful one we can access in this human condition.

This power called love is magical in the literal sense of the word; it can move mountains and do everything our imagination can imagine. Time and space can end, dimensions can merge, and above all, we can access a universal immensity that surrounds us and that we could never reach without it.

I have been there, I have felt all of this, and I couldn't believe everything I felt, everything I lived and experienced. If I were to relate some things, I would be understood here as crazy, and many of these things I wouldn't even have words to explain because, as I said, it is not a science and words have not yet been created to express things like this.

I lived in paradise on earth, the true paradise that so many talk about; I felt it. For a time, peace, freedom, and the simplicity of things flooded my being. God allowed me to access something I had always dreamed of, and I couldn't even imagine that reality would be so much more than that dream.

What I still didn't understand at that moment was that God only wanted to show me what I could achieve when I stripped away everything I still carried in me from so many existences here.

The famous baggage—and what a heavy baggage I had and still have in me!

From paradise to hell was a steep and rapid descent; in a flash, everything was inverted, and I felt like I had no ground, no sky, and nothing. Everything was taken from me as if by magic. From having so much understanding, I became permanently doubtful about what was happening to me, questioning how something like this could be possible, how I fell so fast without even realizing it, and not understanding where I was because everything I saw was dark and getting darker still.

Now I was living in heartbreak, a word I had never used in my life, but now it seemed like a signpost announcing a location in the darkness of my soul, in the deepest pains and fears of my being. Everything was delivered to me with the coldness of the coldest and darkest winter days, as if I had been on a beautiful tropical island and suddenly found myself in the Arctic cold, alone, only seeing the same landscape wherever I looked, naked, cold, and terrified of how I would be able to escape.

I saw the sun, but it no longer warmed me, nor did its light illuminate me. Everything seemed to me as a picture negative, black and hardly discernible.

I, who thought I was at the end of my journey, realized that God had only brought me there for a moment and had taken me back to a point before I remembered ever walking.

Tired and exhausted from a path that had already taken so long to get there, I kneeled down and despaired. "I have no more strength, God. I am tired and exhausted. How can I return to a point worse than where I was before experiencing paradise?" There was silence in that frozen desert; only my screams could be heard, echoing in the emptiness that was both outside and within me.

What can I do? If I don't gain strength and continue, I have motivation within me; I know that everything I have always dreamed of is real. Exhaustion and fatigue cannot stop me anymore. I know that I will always have God's hand to support me. I will leave heartbreak behind and one day return to love, to that place where I want to go back and never leave again. That's where I came from, and that's where I will return: to my eternal dwelling place, where I was created long before the birth of the first star.

Thank you for delving into this excerpt from "Lost in My Soul: Conversations With the Deepest Parts of Me." If these words resonated with you, I invite you to embark on a transformative journey through the pages of my book.

Grab your copy now and set out on a path to connect with the most profound parts of your soul.