Serve Others as a Silent Voice

“Serve others as a silent voice”. All the different nuances of this, so far, so close.

On suffering, on what is and has been this eternal seek-ness (yes, sickness) of my being. “Wait, stay here, do not look up, just with you here, in deep silence.” I’m right now in a state of total float-ness, feather-ness (As light as a feather.) Yes, that’s right. What is all this? I’m a being that is. «Ich bin was ich bin» Noch einmal ich. And yet, something has changed – the connections are there, the little dots are right there, can I put them together?

WHAT IS UNIVERSAL IS SUFFERING. [Little deviation: do you have a mind of your own? Copy and copy, the eternal mimesis, the eternal copy. Humanity as the masters of copying, imitating nature, over and over again. (Why are you bothered with this again? What do you care?) Doesn’t repetition allow to excel? Think: the second moment of genius in music: the collaboration: self-less-ness, humility (the 1970 performance of Joe Cocker orchestrated by Leon Russell; deswegen there’s no place for pretension) or the literal “sacrifice of souls” (Santana’s Woodstock, all those beings united in harmony for the common good) Copy, copy, repetition? Repetitive-Übung macht Meister. I’ll get to think about this more. Repetition is also a mantra or my breathing when I’m climbing up a mountain. (So much to process, please wait!)]

WHAT IS UNIVERSAL IS SUFFERING. “Everyone I know goes away in the end.” We experience constantly the impermanence of being, this temporary state – nonstop. We experience loss; we experience pain and when it goes real deep, sometimes beautiful art emerges: Richie Havens as “the saddest man on Earth”, the sole light of hope to a man in prison “let the Midnight Special shine a light on me” by Leadbelly (what was your real name, Sir (SIR, with capitals)?) Henry Thomas going up to the country - perhaps because you were tired of the racism in the south? So much content, so much depth, only emerge from the cruelest of interactions, from the stamina to endure them, from such an ill experience. And yet, afterwards (Halleluiah!) union, points in which the connection was established, interestingly, through music again: Buddy Holly’s performance at the Apolo (From now on, I’ll miss him even more every time I hear American Pie. Just realized they were membranes as I am. Blessing to the collapse of worlds, blessings to those explorers!), the song of Auf Uns from Andreas Bourani, lately. Thanks! Viel, full gratitude! I bow to you with respect and gratitude.

(So much to process, please wait!)

And the travel and the traveler. Wandering… But not lost! “Lonely, but not lost.” (Echoes of the past.) And the parallels are striking. Yesterday and today: the cogito of Descartes taken to its limits: Ramana Maharshi. (Reminded me a bit of Diogenes, asking Alejandro Magno (Alexander the Great) to get away from the sun.) And yet his teaching was the same ICH, go inside, the-I, it is and has always been right there. “Just different names for the same thing: this I is the emptiness as well.” And no division, no separation, together-ness. Again: when animals allow you to be close to them – you’re doing something right. Ich and ich. And if it is this ich, would that mean that it will end up collapsed in me? So much incredible self-sufficiency, that if it happens – I’m afraid— I may never want to be with some-one ever again. And if that’s the case, only and only then, I’ll be able to devote my un-wilderness to serve.

B.C., Canada,

July 2023