How a Bottle of Wine changed my Life

When I first met my wife, in a nightclub at the White Swan hotel in China, she told me her name was Lisa. It would be a couple of days before she told me that her real name was Lina.

It wasn’t that she was trying to hide her real name from me, under some protective veil of lies, but that in her day to day working life, she was known as Lisa.

You see, she worked at a five star hotel that catered, mostly, to western people and because most Chinese names were difficult for western people to pronounce or remember, she decided to use the name, Lisa– not knowing that the name, Lina, was a common name in the land of my birth.

She didn’t work at the White Swan, but a different hotel that I won’t name here for several reasons–the most important reason being, privacy.

She was at the White Swan hotel that night to meet a good friend that was visiting from Hong Kong and I am so glad that she picked that night for her visit.

The story of that night is below– a night that changed my life!

*****

Twenty-nine hours, that’s how long the trip took; 43 years, that’s how long it took me to find her. One day is how long it took to know that she was the one.

I was born in St. John's, Newfoundland, in April-1959, but my life began in Guangzhou, China, on Friday, September 13-2002. Some say that Friday the 13th is an unlucky day, but I disagree as that's the day that I became known as "Lucky man."

I jumped at the opportunity when my boss asked me to join our control tech, John, on a trip to China to install some machinery in Guangzhou. Before this trip, I'd never travelled outside the U.S. and Canada and was elated at the chance to travel to such a faraway exotic place.

I was in a struggling relationship that ended abruptly, several months before the trip, and looked forward to getting away for a few weeks. My friends were constantly trying to set me up on dates with the perfect match, and it was starting to wear on me as I wasn’t looking for the perfect match or any match at all, really. After the five-year, volatile relationship I'd been in, I needed some time to just be with me.

Up to that point, my longest travelling time had been about 5 or 6 hours. This time I would fly from Toronto to Vancouver, then to Hong Kong and then to Guangzhou, China, a 29 hour trip from home to the hotel. By the time we landed in Guangzhou, I’d decided I would never do this again.

“Boy was I wrong about that;” not only would I do it again; I would make that trip three more times in less than a year.

On our fifth day working at the factory, which was Friday the 13th, our Chinese contacts took us out for dinner and drinks after work. As the factory was closed for the weekend, it turned into a late-night with lots of drinking involved. John was not a drinker, but our Chinese friends kept making toasts and doing shots of a drink called "Baijiu," a potent traditional Chinese cocktail. John had several of these drinks, as he didn’t want to offend our Chinese friends. I could see that he was getting quite drunk and would probably be sick if he had anymore. Concerned for John, I quietly spoke to William, our primary contact, telling him that I needed to get John back to the hotel.

We’d started eating and drinking at about 6 pm, and it was close to 11 pm when William put us in a cab, giving the driver instructions to bring us to the White Swan Hotel.

The "White Swan," a spectacular 5-star hotel located beside the American embassy on Shamian Island, had a reputation as one of the best hotels in China. The small island it sat on was a beautifully maintained area on the Pearl River banks and enjoyed by tourists and locals alike. We were lucky enough to have rooms overlooking the river, and each morning since we arrived, before going down for breakfast, I would make myself a coffee in the room and watch the boat traffic on the river.

When we arrived at the hotel, John said he was feeling sick and decided to go up to his room and sleep. It was a beautiful night and, as I was feeling good and not tired, I decided to walk around the small island for a while before going in. I bid goodnight to John and did a little shopping on the tourist strip across from the "White Swan" before heading back to see if I could get a drink somewhere in the hotel.

The main entrance of the White Swan Hotel opened to the check-in desk and, beyond that, to an open area restaurant that overlooked the Pearl River. In the center of this spectacular foyer, a man-made waterfall fell into a small pond, where "Koi" swam surrounded by lush, live foliage. In front of the pond sat a large three-mast ship, with a dragon head bow, built entirely from Jade.

I entered the hotel and stopped, for a minute, to admire the foyer, as I did every time.

The area was still busy, at close to midnight. Several people were sitting at the restaurant windows, enjoying the view of the river, as others were standing around the waterfall and talking about its beauty and the value of the jade ship.

I walked to the front desk and asked where I could get a drink in the hotel.

The clerk informed me, several places were still open and serving alcohol. There was a snooker room downstairs and two bars and a nightclub upstairs. The nightclub was open until 2 am and was featuring live music and dancing. I decided to go to my room, clean up and change, and then go to the nightclub for some drinks and live music.

Twenty minutes later, I entered the "River Club" too loud rock and roll music, which surprised me. Straight ahead were the dance floor and main bar, both of which looked crowded.

Just inside the door, to my left, a small raised area overlooked the dance floor with a reserved sign in front of it. The raised area had six or seven small tables. All of the tables were empty except the one closest to the dance floor rail, which had two Asian women sitting at it. Beyond this area, I could see the band playing and belting out, “That old-time rock and roll." A Chinese band playing a Bob Segar classic was the last thing I expected to see when I walked in. I walked towards the central part of the club, but there were no empty tables or seats. Surveying the crowded club for a place to sit, I couldn't see any other western faces and decided to try and stake out a place at the bar to watch the band and have a couple of Chinese beers.

I had to wait about ten minutes to be served, as the bartenders were busy dealing with an angry, drunken patron. When they finally got to me, I ordered two beers and turned to watch the band while waiting. The area I stood in was loud with the slamming down of glasses and yelling of four guys sitting at a table close to the bar. It looked like they were trying to see who could drink the most "Baijiu" in the shortest amount of time. These guys were becoming exceedingly annoying, so I decided to take my beer back to the small raised area, drink them quickly and leave.

The small raised area was still empty, but for the two women sitting by the rail, so I decided to sit at the open table closest to the door and finish my beer. Shortly after I sat down, one of the ladies came to my table and politely said, "Sorry, sir, but this area is reserved; our friends will be arriving soon."

I smiled up at her from my seat and pleaded, "Would it be ok if I stay for just a little while? I just want to quickly finish my beer before going down to my room. I promise I'll leave if anyone needs the seat."

The lady smiled back and said, "Yes, that would be ok," and returned to sit with her friend.

There was something about this woman that made me feel comfortable, and I smiled as I noticed her stealing glances at me from her table.

The band was finishing up a slow Chinese song when I sat down and when the song ended, the singer announced that they would be taking a break and would be back to do their final set in fifteen minutes.

The band left the stage and went to the bar, except for the young male singer who came to the raised area and sat down beside one of the ladies, who seemed much older than the other.

I assumed that she was someone important because of the way the servers treated her.

When the singer came to their table, I noticed the younger lady, who’d spoken to me, moved away to sit by herself and seemed uncomfortable as she waited for the singer to leave.

Feeling uncomfortable for her as this scenario played out, and with the courage, I had from the several drinks that night, I ordered a bottle of Merlot delivered to her.

When the server returned with the wine and walked directly to the older woman, I stood up and said, "Sorry, but the wine is for this Woman," as I pointed at the younger lady sitting alone.

The server apologized and placed the wine on the correct table. She looked at the waiter, surprised at first, and then accepted the wine before turning and gracing me with a smile that took my breath away. That smile lit up her face and showed her natural beauty to me. Thinking this must be one of those moments that you read in novels or see in movies, I felt Goosebumps rise on my arms as I smiled back and raised my glass to her.

I was smitten.

Shortly after the wine was delivered, the singer returned to the stage, and the women returned to sitting together again. I could see them glancing my way and speaking low to each other.

After a few minutes, the younger lady stood and came to my table with the bottle of Merlot in her hand.

She was blushing slightly as she thanked me for the wine and, to my surprise, asked if I would like to share it with her.

Not believing this was happening, I said, "Yes, I would like that very much," before standing and pulling out a chair for her to sit.

When she sat, I poured the wine for us and introduced myself, "Hello, Nice to meet you. I'm Gerald from Canada."

She smiled and replied, "Hi" "I'm Lisa from here."

I joked, "From the White Swan Hotel?"

She laughed and said, "From Guangzhou."

She was a beautiful woman, maybe a few years younger than me, and although her English was not perfect and my Chinese was non-existent, we talked until the club was closing and the wine finished. We agreed to meet again and exchanged phone numbers before I took her hand in mine and kissed it, saying, "It's been a pleasure to meet you, Lisa. I look forward to seeing you again".

I could see the future in her eyes, when she graced me with that smile again, and said,

"Thank you, Gerald, I’ve really enjoyed your company and I hope I see you again before you return to Canada."

That night, Friday, September 13th, happened over twenty years ago and changed my life. Some people still call me “lucky man” because of that day.

Lina and I were married five months after we met and have been happily married now for twenty years and counting. Over these many years I have learned a lot about love. From the spark of love at first sight to the flames of passion to the warmth of comfort that grows over time.

I’ve learned that true and lasting love is not something that happens easily, it needs to be cared for and worked on just like a prized flower garden. Love needs to be fed and watered to blossom but most of all any unwanted weeds that appear need to be dealt with and removed as soon as they appear. You can never let these weeds of misunderstanding or unkind words grow.

You need to be mindful of the little things because lasting love is not about the big things or the grand gestures. It is simply about the joy you feel in seeing your partner happy!

I still smile when I think about the first time we shared a bottle of Merlot.