Don’t tell my husband but music is my first love. It’s my soul food. When it’s really good, a song can be like sexual and soul attraction rolled into one amazing, dirty weekend. The one where you stumble into a Vegas wedding, resided by Elvis, in a fit of erotic asphyxiation and end up ten years later, enduringly married to your twin flame. That familiar blanket, encasing you amongst the blues of winter, yet folded patiently on the foot of the bed in the swirling, fiery heat. It feels good to go through life’s adventures together. Songs heal. They whisper loving devotions across the rawness of your exposed neck. Amazing Life, from The Winter I Chose Happiness, by Clare Bowditch is that song for me.
Overcrowded thoughts buzzing around in my head the whole day. Panic energy zooming around inside me as the day progresses. Just wishing the day would end but knowing tomorrow will be the same cycle of panic.
“In the end, as we fade into the night
Who will tell the story of your life?”
1. an optical illusion caused by atmospheric conditions, especially the appearance of a sheet of water in a desert or on a hot road caused by the refraction of light from the sky by heated air.
2. an unrealistic hope or wish that cannot be achieved.
Truth Hurts is a humorous track that is carried by a beat that makes you want to dance and scream the lyrics with your girlfriends. I remember being excited that a song came out that empowered women and put an emphasis on knowing your self worth and accepting nothing less. There were a few other Lizzo songs in rotation at the time (around July 2019), so I just assumed her album had been recently released and these were her singles. I carried that line of thinking until recently when I was watching the music video and noticed that the song was released in 2017.
Mid- Summer I found myself sitting online, blogging on Tumblr unaware of what would unfold. The day that changed everything. This story is about how I met my partner; the long nights talking away, time flying - yes it really did fit all those cliches.
When you think of starting over, in terms of life-style choices or in general one may consider making peace with themselves. A trail of thoughts and ideas come to mind. Somehow, the unpleasant seems reasonable to face head on and everything that was avoided from the beginning is hard to ignore. At least in my opinion.. Maybe make amends with those you hurt or hurt you. Or moving on to another endeavor, be it a new hobby, job opportunity, or relationship. So much will come to mind in terms of truly stepping out of the norm and gradually making changes for the better.
“I took this walk to ease my mind,”
My husband drove while I stared out the window and watched the clouds form shapes.. My mother had slipped into a semi-coma and it was taking forever to get from Flagstaff to Aztec NM to see her. I didn't know if I would ever see her alive again or not, and memories kept flooding my mind.