Dance to the Beat of Your Own Drum

Ahh…Valentine’s Day - The holiday where we as a culture are both brainwashed and conditioned to believe that in order to feel and celebrate love, we must be in a “relationship” with a significant other. This day can be tremendously daunting and challenging for those that are single and buy into this belief. I know this because this was my reality for many years. As the day approached, I can remember feeling alone, depressed and ashamed that I didn't have someone "special" to share it with. When you don't have a solid inner connection to yourself, the hype of this holiday can cause you to want to crawl under the covers and pretend the day doesn't exist.

I’m both eternally grateful and relieved to say that through a tremendous amount of growth, I have come to understand the deeper truth about love and am now able to enjoy this day from a completely different perspective. So to all you singles out there who might find yourself feeling the blues, it is my hope that you consider opening up to this empowering perspective about love as well.

When we commit to awakening to our own self-love, we also awaken to an inner knowing that love doesn’t come from anything or anyone outside of us. Love is who we are and more importantly, loving ourselves first and formemost is the most powerful gift we can give to the world. When we genuinely love ourselves for who we are, we don’t need one day out of the year to define how love should look and we certainly don't need to be in a significant relationship to give ourselves permission to celebrate this day or any day for that matter. We understand that our true power comes from all the different ways that we can pour love out into the world. When we reclaim our own love for ourselves, we also reclaim the love we have to offer not just to one person on one specific day of the year, but to the world on any given day of the year. The following are 8 songs that powerfully express the message of self-love and self-worth - just a few of the traits that when embodied will remind you that you don't need a holiday to feel love, give love or be loved. So not just on this Valentine's Day, but on any day, I encourage you to choose yourself, blast this playlist, and dance to the beat of your own drum.

1. "I Love Myself" | Hailee Steinfeld

The title of this song says it all. This song speaks of you being your own best cheerleader. My favorite lyric is “Love me so hard till it hurts.” So often we put much of our energy towards loving someone else even if it hurts ourselves in the process. The idea of putting all of our own love back onto ourselves till it hurts feels so freeing. When we redirect our own love back to oursleves, we open the door to our unlimited potential. In my opinion, tapping into our potential is the best Valentine's gift we could ever give to ourselves.

2. "Girl on fire" | Alicia Keys

As I’ve journeyed on the road to what self-love tuly means, I've come to realize that a big part of it means being courageous enough to access the flames of passion and creativity within us while fiercely holding the belief that we are here to live with an open heart and fearlessly express our authentic truth. We certainly don't need a holiday to give us permission to ignite the fire of passion that lives within us.

3. "Lose You to Love Me" | Selena Gomez

It's not uncommon for most of us to surrender to self-love after being devastatingly heart broken. After realizing that we put forth so much effort into loving another person only to lose ourselves in the process - we also understand that it's a gift in disguise. Ultimately, it helps us to see that all that effort needed to be directed back at ourselves. A powerful lyric in this song is "This dancing was killing me softly.” When we are so focused on dancing soley for someone else…it never works. It will kill us every single time. However, when we dance to the beat of our own drum, well then we will give oursleves permission to dance anywhere at anytime with anyone and that is the most attractive thing in the world.

4. "Born This Way" | Lady Ga Ga

This song is the epitome of self-love and screams self-worth. There are countless simple yet powerful lyrics in this song including "I was born to be brave." When we embrace our own love, we also embrace and spark the bravery within us. We step out on the ledge. We take risks. We believe in ourselves. We all have a brave warrior within us and when we tap into this energy we know that we can celebrate the love we have for both ourselves and others not just on Valentine's Day, but on any damn day we desire.

5. "Fight Song" | Rachael Platten

Do you feel like giving up on love this Valentine's Day? Listen to "Fight Song" a few times.

"I might only have one match but I can make an explosion." When you hear this lyric, it will remind you that there is only one of you. It will remind you of your power and that it only takes one of you to create an explosion in this life. Put yourself out there. Express your truth. Do your thing in only the way that you know how to do it. You are here at this time on Earth to make a difference.

6. "Brave" | Sara Barielles

"Maybe one of these days you can let the light in" In her hit song, "Brave" Barielles speaks to the importance of speaking your truth and letting the light in. It is only when we radically accept and love ourselves for exactly who we are can we then let the light in and shine our truth out into the world. I am here to tell you this Valentine's Day that the world desperately needs your ever-loving truth to shine bright.

7. Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) | Kelly Clarkson

"You didn’t think that I'd come back. I came back swinging." In this lyric, Clarkson speaks of growing in strength despite our heartbreaks and challenges. On this Valentine's Day, take a few moments to reflect on every disappointment or betrayal you've experienced. Reflect on them not to sink deeper into your sorrow, but to acknowledge your strength and bad ass determination that helped you come out on the other side. Own your experiences as lessons not as failures. Extract the gold and leave the rest. You know nothing can bring you down because nothing and nobody can define who you are. You know you are love and the world needs you to sprinkle that shit everywhere you go.

8. "Me" | Taylor Swift

Being a true Swifty, I could NOT create this playlist without a song from her enormous catalog of songs. "ME!" embodies the power of knowing there is nobody like you in this entire world. The lyric that I love most is "I promise that you'll never find another like me." When you can say this to yourself and more importantly embody it in every cell of your being, you won't know how to settle for anything or anyone less than what your Soul resonates with. When you embrace the unique Soul that is you, it will be impossible for you to tolerate someone else's demands of you. You will only tolerate what you demand of yourself. This Valentine's Day, take inventory of all the ways you are unique and let that unique light of yours shine. The world deserves you to BE you.