The "Staycation"

I hear it all the time "I don't know how you would travel with kids as a single parent." I mean what do you expect Susan, me to stay home and loose my mental sanity?

Typically people I know mean well when they make comments like this, especially when they know my kiddos have autism. However, my drive to explore has never gone away. I think part of it has to do with me having prior service, and the other half having been in foster care. Both elements are very restrictive. You have to ask for permission to go places, and background checks, and travel plans. Everyone has always needed to know my every move, and now that I have a new sense of freedom I take advantage of it.

I have travelled cross country twice, and I love to drive. I love to explore little hole in the wall places. There's a sense of freedom having no commitments, and just packing up the kids and the dogs in the car, and just seeing something new. In a way I think part of this is reliving my childhood through my kids. I never got to do a lot of these things growing up, and now I have the opportunity to share these experiences with my sons. As a first time experience! Or revisit old places that I vaguely remember.

I love seeing the kids excited, and when I travel it proves to me that I am independent. Them being little I pack them all up, I do all the check in, I plan all the meals. In a way I look at it from the perspective of me already doing a lot of this at home. The difference? I'm just in another place. It's been healthy for me because it resets my head when I need to start over.

This year I have been pretty strapped for cash, and was even supposed to go to Oregon to do visitation with my kids dad. But I genuinely could not afford it. Tickets on some airlines were over $3,000. That was not including a rental car or a hotel to stay near by. So instead I did a staycation. This allowed us to get out of the house, but still see somewhere "new" for a more affordable getaway. I shouldn't say Chicago is new, because I literally live in Illinois. The difference is in a big city there is always a cool food place or an attraction to see.

Our first stop in town was Millennium Park! We only live about 4 hours away from Chicago, so once we dropped off all our stuff at the BNB we went to the park. I wanted to maximize everything on this trip as much as possible. I will say the park has changed quite a bit since the last time we went. The whole park is gated off and there is a lot of security present. We went to a strip inside of the park that had some food joints over the hill and grabbed some pizza! You could tell the dough was super fresh, and sauce is made daily! It's a bit pricey but I would still recommend it anyway!

After we got done eating, I wanted to burn off as much energy from the kids. So we started walking around and came across this amazing public splash pad! It was free and honestly the boys had an amazing time with it! This has been here a long time, but the locals love it! It's a great place in the city to cool off on a hot summers day! There were so many kids in their swimsuits running around and parents just sitting on the benches surrounding the park.

So I will say this, if you want to maximize your visit- I highly recommend getting a City Pass. Basically you can buy 5 tickets and get them massively discounted. Definitely would say that the aquarium is one of those places that is a must see. My son Gatsby loves the ocean animals, even more as he has gotten older. He watches national geographic for fun, and lately he's been on a kick to see sharks and orcas. I had never actually been to the Shedd aquarium in Chicago before, but I definitely liked it a lot. Just make sure that if you do buy passes- make sure you get the one with 5 options on it and not just the 3. There is a distinction on this, and I actually spent money outside of the City Pass because I bought the 3 pass one. This did not include the Field Museum. Again you are getting a lot for the situation, and they are massively discounted.

Here at the Shedd aquarium they have all kinds of animals. I genuinely created core memories here with my kids. I felt like through seeing my kids so excited and happy, I noticed how much my cares of the world melted away. I had become so focused on parenting and doing all the day to day stuff, that basically I had forgotten what it was like to just pause. To just breathe and be present. It's hard because as a single parent I'm doing double the work, so that means I don't have often a spare moment to just breathe.

It's not about the concept of having a million dollars and having extravagant moments, I got to see the boys get super excited about exploring something new to them. Stuff that interested them, and seeing how much knowledge they actually have about things was definitely insightful. Gatsby and Albus both are on the autism spectrum, Albus being more severe than Gatsby. Often times I notice how much more attention I give Albus because his needs are different. On this trip however I got to see Gatsby shine! He was genuinely so happy- and he was able to identify so many ocean animals and dinosaurs. I saw how smart my son truly is!

With the Field Museum I felt like even though it had been a few years, we have gone here before, and definitely had a different feel to it. I feel like the gift shop was actually a lot smaller. Before you could buy really cool crystals and it seems like they down sized quite a bit. They strictly focus on selling merch for Sue the T-Rex. This is the largest T-Rex on record. I will say they did add a cafe- or maybe it was there prior and I don't remember. Either way it was VERY pricy. I honestly would pack a lunch and eat there. We spent almost $40 on just a few items.

I mean I learned a lot on this trip, and genuinely helped me reset. There's something about getting out of your day to day environment, and just exploring. Seeing there's more to life than just chilling out on your front porch. Even though it wasn't the beach, I felt more relief than anything. It allowed me to do some goal setting, slow down, and realize I need to get off my damn phone every now and again. Life is literally flashing before my eyes.

I saw how badly social media was impacting my mental health, and I slowly started deleting the apps. Whether it was dating or snapchat, I started with one and now I am down to just 2. I realized I spent more time glued to my phone to escape the world when I was overly stimulated rather than channeling it into something healthy. I got to see my son flourish in an environment that made him HAPPY. He was so thrilled to educate me on what sharks eat, or seeing a Beluga whale in person. These are literal experiences that are once in a life time. Honestly my kids didn't care. They didn't care about how much money was spent, or if they got souvenirs- which he got his stuffed Beluga to take home. But they were happy!

We ended up walking around quite a bit, and I noticed how safe it was where we stayed, and I realized how important it was to take walks to get out some of that energy. So we made it a point that when we would come back to start taking an afternoon/evening walk before bed time. While we were walking back from this amazing Macaroni and Cheese place, we happened to come across this rock garden that I found to be really interesting. It was filled with rocks that kids have done with positive affirmations. Since my son Albus is really artistic, it gave me an idea for an activity to do when we got back. So this upcoming paycheck- I plan to go buy Posca pens and do a mini rock garden around my mail box! One of my neighbors has some river rock that they are getting rid of, and so we are going to make a mini rock garden of our own! To inspire the neighborhood and bring positivity to our space.

So if you are tight on cash, don't feel bad. Your kids or partner want quality time with you. That's what this is about, spending one on one time with the family and creating healthy positive experiences that will last a life time. If you don't know where to start, I would look into what makes your kid tick! Like my son- if they like sharks look at aquariums. Or inspire little artists through art galleries, and channel these experiences to your own home! What places have you gone that you would want others to see? Comment your ideas below! The world is your oyster!

-Kayla