Move in me...

"Life moves us like the ocean waves, closer and nearer, yet sometimes past the distant horizon... always stirring us towards our desire for a deeper connection, alas... the depth of the sea is found in thee." ~ Dolphingirl

I come around to the morning with birds chirping in the palm trees nearby, and then faintly, I hear the distant calling of ocean waves. Yet, before I can even rise out of bed, the ocean has already been forming my day in her ebb and flow. Oh, I miss you ocean waves... the coolness covering my skin, the movement in your currents against my feet as I step from the sandy edge into your lapping arms. I feel you, like you feel me.

Restless though, I wait for you... from my small bedroom window I know you're there, forming the very breath I'm breathing, to the clouds' patterns I see drifting by through the rectangle shaped world I've reluctantly grown accustomed to over the past few months.

Even though the steps in returning to you seem faded, like a well-worn pair of jeans... your waves knows my very essence and shape.

I imagine going outside my front door, and walking excitedly down the overgrown hillside to your watery edge, yet just before I reach your crystal shores, I'm surprisingly greeted by my beach side friend, the beautiful cardinal. She has missed me, as I her, and in reuniting, we share our tasty ritual of sunflower seeds together.

After the magical encounter with my winged companion, I happily disrobe into my black bikini, and with my trusty fin and snorkel I carefully cross the heated cream colored sand into your welcoming swells and calm ripples. You are the healing waters I've needed, and the healing waters that will forever be. True.

Now that I've returned back to you, I am home. Undulating and moving to your sea rhythm and pulses, I feel your silent surges of energy ripple through me, as I become one with you again. The months of strain, worry, and fears disappear into your blue, and my breath realigns with you. Like memories of a movie from another world, my tears of loss softly merges with your deepness, as if they never existed apart from you. I am grateful, so I dive further down into your mysteries. As I look up towards the sky, I am reminded that the sunlight always glistens though the water, like rays of hope.

Renewed, I can let go of my trepidation in returning back to the land of living. Trusting you will be there for me beyond my rectangle window, I feel your salty air reaching me, and reminding me to hold on. Hold onto what is good, true, and beautiful. Just like you, I am moved by your mighty waves, as well as the soft still lapping across my heart. Thank you ocean. Thank you waves. We will get through these turbulent currents together. I wrote a poem for you inside my bedroom walls in anticipation of our aquatic reunion, it's titled "Imagine."

Imagine a world aquatic

where anger and fear disappear and your friends are near

Imagine a world aquatic

where every breath matters and sound is free of chatter

Imagine a world aquatic

where words are gifts of flowers and the moment lasts an hour

Imagine…

As my feet touch the wet sands of earth, I shyly transform from my mermaid self back into a human girl. I say human girl instead of woman, because I still love my innocence, and fiercely wanting that sense of curiosity and wonder kept alive. Inside, I am asking and searching for the waves in which I may take you, and all your aquatic wonder into fueling my life's passions. How may I instill your majestic beauty and grace into as many moments of life as possible, like drops in a rainfall? I long for my thoughts, words, feelings and actions to be filled with your strength, your sense of hope, and your true love.

Is that possible, ocean waves? A smile comes across my face. The ocean hears my calling... as I hear you, my faithful friend. A new chapter continues in our oceanic journey, for the ocean is touching all of us, down to our blood, sweat, and tears. So yes, I am forever happy you are near.