Baker’s Dozen: 13 Things I Liked to Say to Guests at Jurassic World: the Exhibition (Denver, 2022)

I'm overdue for a Baker's Dozen piece! Let me introduce readers to what I've been up to for most of the year - and the reason I've hardly written lately; Jurassic World: the Exhibition! (Old link, the Exhibition is moving!)

I honestly fell in love with the job! Sure, sure, some adults didn't give a crap about what I had to say and sometimes kids were a handful, but overall...

...I absolutely loved working at Jurassic World: the Exhibition while it was in Denver, Colorado. When I was first hired on, the entire staff was epic - full of dino-nerds and people who loved the franchise. As time wore on, it was filled with more folks looking for a quick gig - sometimes I even wondered why some folks signed up for the job as they had zero interest for it. But, that said, it was still a roaring good time!

As I write this, I'm waiting to hear if I will be continuing on as part of the team in San Diego! I don't see a reason why I shouldn't be accepted, but on the off-chance I am denied, I do want to write about my favorite things to tell guests while working the stint in Denver while they're still fresh in my mind!

Bear in mind, everyone has their own way of interacting with guests, so the following things were/are exclusive to me working a particular room. Also, it's hard to pick a favorite, so these are in no particular order! Moreover, since I may be staying on, I will largely continue in present tense.

All photos were taken by me (except one of me).

1) Oh, Don't Mind All That Screaming...

One of the rooms I worked last was actually the first: our Ferry out to Isla Nublar, where Jurassic World lies! Part of my hesitance about working the first room was just that - it's first. I'm not always 100% there those first few groups as the coffee and/or Red Bull kicks in, so I put off working the Ferry until I had to. I'm kinda sorry I waited; I actually wound up really enjoying it!

Now, when I work the Ferry, here's what guests will hear:

"Hello! You're just in time - we're loading our next ferry out to Isla Nublar! Please take a seat on the benches - facing the screen works best but if you wanna sit the other way, I'm not gonna judge! Just please do NOT sit on that box in the back - it does NOT bear weight!"

*Cue people screaming and the T-rex roaring elsewhere in the exhibition*

"Ah, I hear they're playing those advertisements on the boat again! Nothing sells it quite like people screaming and dinosaurs roaring..."

*Cue me nonchalantly flipping the counter in my hand and looking at our timer*

...Sure makes the other captains look twice, though!"

Thing is, the way the exhibition was laid out - and may be laid out at the next stop - the T-rex was close to the Ferry, so it was hard to ignore when the screaming and roaring started. This, in turn, would sometimes upset kiddos and ruin what was supposed to be a fun experience before it even started!

Thinking fairly quickly, I adopted the idea that the extra noise was just an advertisement on the boat, so when I have a group and those screams start up, I just announce that so that kids aren't quite so scared; it's not something actually going wrong, just a noisy advertisement! Still, sometimes it is just too much, and I've seen kids that weren't even able to get into the exhibition without an upset.

That said, it doesn't stop people from thinking something is going to come through the doors at the back of the boat... I promise, there are no loose dinosaurs on our Ferry! We are just going to the island!

2) Don't Touch the Raptors!

Now, while this falls under my list for favorite things to tell guests, I will say it's also a rather annoying thing - mostly because guests tend not to listen and I wind up repeating myself time and again. It's actually very important that I say part of the following. Once guests reach carnivore territory, they will be with the group of people in the room for the remainder of their visit, and the carnivores are dangerous! That said, when guests approach the Raptor Paddock and I am working the area, they should hear something along the lines of the following:

"Hello and welcome to our Raptor Paddock! Now, for your safety, I do have to inform you that these animals - our Velociraptors - are lethal at six months of age! The ones you see here are all full-grown adults, so please DO NOT climb on the gates or try to pet them! Even with their muzzles, they can still do some damage!

That said, the individuals we have in here today are Echo, Delta, and Charlie! These are sisters to fan favorite Blue!"

Now, I mentioned that this can be annoying, and that's largely because, despite my best attempts to inform every group walking in NOT TO TOUCH THE RAPTORS...

...People still touch the raptors. Kids sometimes climb on the gates, but it is ALWAYS an adult that reaches over and tries to pet the raptors. And 99% of the time, it is a full-grown man... Who should know better.

Some readers may be wondering what the big deal is; they're in muzzles, so what can they do? Well...

Newsflash and spoiler! While we play it off as "all the animals are real" for the sake of kids, the fact is that these ARE animatronics. In the case of the raptors, they snarl and flare their nostrils. Those hydraulics inside don't care if a guest is touching the raptor; they'll indiscriminately crush anything that goes where it shouldn't. And that's why it's a big deal that guests NOT touch our raptors - we don't want people to get hurt. We may joke as if it's to make sure everyone keeps their fingers; in fact, it IS to make sure everyone keeps their fingers! Don't touch the raptors!

That said, introducing Blue's sisters is something that was usually exclusive to me; there were coworkers who wouldn't even say anything to guests, despite that we are supposed to warn them to keep their distance! In my mind, folks came here for interaction, so I try to offer a good, safe experience!

3) Pointing Out the Brachiosaurus Footprint!

Admittedly, I don't say much for this one; I typically just point it out to guests if we are waiting for baby Bumpy to come visit us in the Land of Giants! But, if I do, it usually goes like this:

"Hey folks! Have you ever wondered how your footprint measures up to one of our Brachiosaurs'?"

*Often I will place my booted foot in the first toenail*

"Most people's entire foot fits in one of their toenails!"

I do like to draw attention to the footprint - hardly anyone else does and very few guests notice it without a Ranger pointing it out.

4) It's Probably Just a Compy...

I didn't often have to work in Gyrosphere Valley, but the times I did were... a bit rough. This area is kind of a calming down area between two of the most intense interactions guests will have during their visit!

The hard part comes once our baby carnivore is taken back for feeding. Though guests can take photos with our Gyrosphere, they are not allowed in it, which many will grumble about. There is also a fossil dig station and some videos to keep folks entertained, but generally, in this quiet lull, folks start getting anxious.

"When do we leave this area?" they may ask, and generally, I have no idea; the determining factors of the when are outside of my control, so all I can do is wait with guests. This does leave open room for a little foreshadowing!

"You know," I'll start, "I'm kinda surprised how quiet it is today. Usually we've got alarms going off. Oh, don't worry! The alarms usually get set off by our Compies. They're not much to be worried about; tiny little things. But they are always getting out and setting off alarms. It's kinda nice how peaceful it is today..."

*Cue the alarm sounding off and lights flashing at some point after*

"Agh! I spoke too soon! Don't worry folks, it's probably just a Compy! I am gonna have to direct you over to those doors, though!" I'll continue, waving them over to the doors to their next interaction.

5) If You Find Anything Good, Let Me Know!

While we're in Gyrosphere Valley, I do have one other small line that I like to deliver in that odd lull, typically when there's a lot of folks by the dig station. Just a little bit of flavor text!

*Watching folks dig for the fossils*

"For those of you working in the fossil dig site - if you find anything good, let me know! I'll be happy to take credit for whatever you find!"

Hey, I try to have fun with it, okay? And folks who come here, "for the kids" seem to enjoy a little extra humor.

6) Give it up for Our Brave Trainer and Clever Girl, Blue!

One of the most obvious favorites in the Jurassic World franchise - and consequently, the Exhibition - is none other than Blue, the most agreeable of our Velociraptors! But don't let the term "most agreeable" fool you - our Raptors are still dangerous animals with, ahem, "killer instincts". Even Blue.

Now, I'm not gonna lie; of all the rooms, the Raptor Training Show is my absolute least favorite to work! There's a lot of equipment to handle, a lot of communication with other workers on a scale not seen in the rest of the Exhibition, and a lot of, "Where's Blue?" to be had! I can and will work the room, but it's more stressful to me than I like to tolerate and I only take it on when asked!

Now, when guests leave the Raptor Paddock, they do so by entering another room next door through a sliding gate only Rangers operate. Depending on who is working the room, guests may be informed that Blue isn't in the Paddock with her sisters because she is going to be putting on a training exercise in the next room - the Raptor Training Facility! When I work the gate, I always announce this. However, adding to that stress level of the show, I've worked with Rangers who didn't say anything, leaving me to also explain to our guests that, "No, Blue didn't escape! She's getting ready to put on a training show for everyone in here! I think we'd be more concerned if one of our Raptors were loose!"

The dialogue inside the Raptor Training Show is pretty standard fare; "Please don't climb on the enclosure, make sure flash photography is OFF (very, very important), and we hope you enjoy the show!"

What sets my take on the Raptor Show apart from other Rangers is how I end mine:

"Let's give it up for our brave trainer and clever girl, Blue!"

I know, I know; so exciting. Not really. But, some Rangers don't even acknowledge the hard-working trainer risking it all in the enclosure with Blue. And not all Rangers like to admit just how clever a girl Blue really is!

7) Into the Lab - The Shape of Eggs

Another area I didn't expect to like as much as I do is the Hammond Creation Lab. One of the biggest perks of working it (for me) is just how much there is to talk about! It's 50/50 if guests get an interactive lab host, and when I'm in the lab, I have a lot of fun talking points.

One of them being why there is a difference in the shape of our Velociraptor eggs compared to the other eggs featured in the lab!

Now, I'm not an actual scientist/biologist/paleontologist, folks, so what I say here may not be 100% correct, though I can say my claims are plausible. I'm a big fan of all types of nature documentaries and books, and I'm not too shabby at answering unexpected questions with plausible answers. That said, my personal take on our differing egg shapes is as follows (bear with me):

"Now, as you're looking at our eggs, you might notice that one of them - our Velociraptor egg - looks a bit different than the other eggs; it's not the same shape. The reason for the different shapes has to do with dinosaur hips. Dinosaur hips come in two different variations: the bird-hip and the lizard-hip. The main difference being which way the hip is orientated within the body..."

*At this point, I typically indicate with my hands that these two hip variations face opposite directions*

"...and this also determines the diameter of the eggs that can be laid. Dinosaurs with the lizard-hip variation have what we'll call a larger "hip box"; their hips are wider and so they can lay those really big, fat, round eggs. A good modern-day example would be the sea turtle, actually."

*Now I generally indicate the Velociraptor egg again*

"Now, Velociraptors are therapods, and therapods tend to have that bird-hip variation. They are much more narrow, and because of that, they tend to lay these much more narrow egg shapes - like modern birds."

I will say, as much fun as I have with this speech that I came up with, it is lengthy and whether because of that or the sensitive nature of hips and eggs, I rarely have an active audience long. So why do I try this lengthy explanation? Well, part of it has to do with the young dinosaurs that are brought out on occasion. They aren't always out, and when I'm overseeing the lab, it's important that I try to keep guests entertained until the toddler creatures are ready to come say hello. Also, right or wrong, I'm incredibly proud of all of my lab work - and that includes long speeches. Plus, some guests do enjoy it, and most of the time, so do I.

Now, I said that this information may not be 100% correct. I don't know for sure how much of this information is good to be honest, though I do know there are in fact two different hip types in dinosaurs and they are bird- and lizard-hip. They also face different directions.

What I can't say for certain, and that I speculate, is that one actually delivers wider, rounder eggs and the other slimmer eggs. It seems plausible to me and makes sense to me that this is correct; narrower hips should mean narrower eggs. The wrench in my theory, though, comes from another modern animal; the ostrich. These giant, flightless birds with their bird hips lay very large, round eggs - the largest that can be delivered by todays' egg-layers.

Then again, this is Jurassic World, and I'll take a little creative license. Very few folks would probably even think to argue the point, if they were even paying attention at all!

8) I Call Her Monarch

This gorgeous girl (all our dinosaurs on the tour are female) is one of our Stygimolochs. The full speech I have for her is quite long, and while I have no one but myself to blame for that, for now, I'll simply introduce her.

It isn't uncommon to be approached by a guest who asks not only what species this dinosaur is, but what her actual name is. What do we call her? And that can be very tricky.

Names in the franchise have always been hodge-podge; even the first rex is known by a few names. Many refer to the animal as Roberta or Rexy; Roberta being the name of the rex animatronic of the first Jurassic Park film given by the cast, and Rexy being the arguably more well-known "name" for the franchise-spanning Tyrannosaur. In Jurassic World, some park workers only refer to the animals as assets. Some are never mentioned to have a name.

So what do I tell a guest who comes and asks me what this strange dinosaur's name is?

"Well, names get complicated here. Some young dinos are so new, we haven't named them yet! Other workers might refer to the animals as assets and nothing more. But this girl here? Personally, I call her Monarch."

*At this, I usually point to the spikes on the back of her head or hold my hands behind my head, fingers spread, to indicate the spikes*

"I call her that because of those spikes on the back of her head; they remind me of a crown. Very regal. So yeah, I call her Monarch - even the "Monarch of the Land of Giants!""

9) Back to the Lab - The Growth Rate of Our Parasaurolophus Hatchlings

These babies are also a hot spot for the question, "What are their names?" Honestly, I tend to tell folks that these are so new, we don't know their personalities yet and so can't name them. But that's not my main conversation about these hatchlings!

Rather, as they are front and center in the lab as guests enter, I use them as a way to start entertaining guests before the next toddler dino is brought out to meet guests. And that usually goes something like this:

"Now, I see some of you have taken a liking to some of our hatchlings. These here are baby Parasaurolophus, less than a week old! They hatched out of eggs about this big around," I'll begin as I show off the approximate size of the Parasaurolophus eggs in the incubators with my hands.

"Now, you might think that that's quite the growth spurt - and you'd be right! All of our animals are genetically engineered to grow really big, really fast. That's actually why these babies are here in this incubator; they're conserving their energy. Right now, they don't have to use their own energy to stay warm, so they can use that energy to grow instead..."

Typically, by this point, kids are starting to tap on the glass to wake the hatchlings.

"Oh, please don't disturb them! That growth spurt takes a lot out of them; consequently, they sleep about 16-18 hours a day right now. In a few more weeks, they'll be much more active, but also about three times the size."

Following this, if the handlers haven't brought out the toddler yet, I'll continue on by stating I wished they would stay so small for longer as they're quite cute. But also that I can't be too sad about how quickly they grow as we have a bunch of other eggs in the lab, soon to hatch!

10) I Told You Not To Be So Loud...

If the Raptor Training Show is my least favorite to work, the Indominus Rex enclosure might just be my favorite! Hard to say; I have a few rooms I really, really enjoy. But I probably did work this room most often of my favorites!

The dialogue for this enclosure is mostly pretty much the same across all the Rangers: no climbing, no flash photography, and no sudden movements or loud sounds. We, as Rangers, try not to draw this massive animal's attentions; she's quite aggressive, after all. Moreso when it's feeding time, but she is aggressive all the time!

Forgive the footage I provided above; I was towards the back of the room during the last showing of the Indominus Rex at the Denver 2022 tour. I'm also not well-versed using my phone's camera - especially for video. I did want to provide the video for some context, however.

Now, after the Indominus Rex retreats back into the darkness of her enclosure, our lights turn back on. Usually, some guests - typically younger ones or teens - will be loud or even obnoxious as the encounter plays out. This is frustrating for other guests and Rangers alike and can be an unwelcome distraction. Usually, though, nothing can really be done about a chatty kiddo if the guardian won't address them, so the only thing I've found that I can do...

*The lights turn back on and I take a breath before I begin with a loud, relieved exhale*

"Whew! She got pretty close that time! I told you not to [use flash photography or] make too much noise! It really gets her attention!"

As with disruptive noise, flash photography is a very annoying thing in the Indominus enclosure; the flash reflects off the glass and can ruin the experience for the entire room! So either will elicit my response. I might be a tad annoyed, but the remark is overall meant to be humorous and lighten the mood for any other disgruntled guests or slightly upset children that found our massive I-Rex to be a little too scary. It can be rather funny. I did have one or two embarrassed moms think I was actually serious when I dropped the, "I told you not to make so much noise" after their kids were a tad too disruptive, causing them to apologize, but I mostly make the comments in jest. Mostly.

11) Easter Eggs Trapped in Amber

I did say there were a lot of things in the Hammond Creation Lab! Among them, an entire wall of mosquitoes, trapped in amber. When prompted, I often inform guests that these are to-scale replicas of the pieces and insects we extracted our dinosaur D.N.A. from. Some read between the lines. Others... others do not. There have definitely been guests that left fully believing those mosquitoes in amber were actual specimens...

...

Anycase, all these mosquitoes have some information inscribed beneath them, informing guests and lab technicians of just where the specimens were found - as well as the type of dinosaur blood recovered from them!

On a few, though, a little something extra can be found. Easter eggs! Rather, a couple of well-known names associated with the Jurassic Park/World franchises! However, all too often, the amber wall and those tiny little details go fully unnoticed. When I see guests taking their time examining the wall, however, I see an opportunity, though it does mean slightly "breaking character" (fun fact: despite reviews often referring to Rangers as actors/performers, I consider myself neither and often run rooms from the perspective of my past retail jobs involving and focusing on customer engagement).

"I see some of you are very interested in our collection of insects in amber! Now, if you're fans of the original novels and movie franchise, there's actually a few easter eggs placed within the amber wall - a couple names you might recognize..."

I won't give away their positions (they might change anyway at the new site), but anyone who finds them typically winds up with a smile or a chuckle. It's those little things.

12) The Monarch Speech

Buckle up folks! This is a rocking ride of a speech!

Now, if anything proves how much I enjoyed myself at this job, it's probably coming up with my own speeches in the lab and here at the Stygimoloch! In fact, this dinosaur doesn't even have a speech typically! Depending on the Ranger, guests might only be greeted by the sight of this dinosaur ramming the truck and nothing more. Some did put on a good show. Many favored telling guests that this dino was simply playing peek-a-boo in the truck; very kid-friendly.

But me...

Well...

*Watches as guests begin to approach the truck. When the first guests are close enough to warrant the start of the speech, I indicate the safety barrier just behind the truck.*

"Hey there, folks! Now, so long as everyone stays on this side of the safety barrier, we should be just fine! Feel free to take photos with our Stygimoloch!

Now, Stygimoloch is a type of Pachycephalosaur; see that domed head she's got? That's a trademark of the Pachycephalosaur family! What they do with those domes is - much like today's big-horn sheep - they ram and headbutt with those! [In fact, that dome she's got there is about 8-9 inches thick! You really don't wanna get hit by that!]"

*Typically, at some point, the Stygimoloch will lower herself in the truck and begin ramming the door*

"Now, some of you have probably noticed this "predatory livestock" sign here on the back of the truck..." I say this while pointing to the sign,"Well, don't worry! She's actually an herbivore - she only eats plants! However, because of that headbutting being so dangerous, we do like to move her in these types of trucks: we know she can't break out of them or damage them! I wouldn't be standing at the back end of this truck if I didn't trust it!

[Some of you may think she looks really big in the back of the truck, but actually, if I were to take her out and set her on the ground next to me - she'd only be as tall as me! I could actually look this dinosaur in the eye! Uh, probably not for very long though; she'd probably give me a really nasty headache for the effort! Especially today; our truck broke down early in the day and she's been stuck out here since. Really hard to find a good auto-mechanic on Isla Nublar - especially one that will work on a truck with a living dinosaur in it! Understandably, she's not very happy about it!]

All that being said, I promise she's not going anywhere, so feel free to take photos with her!"

I do exclude some parts if groups look too disinterested in what I'm saying or if there's not enough time to do the entire thing. But I couldn't just stand there like some of the others and not try to get guests interested in this dino! Moreover, kids are always wondering what she's doing when she's ramming the doors and wondering why we have her in such a small "cage"/why the truck is broken. It's a long road from start to finish, but I had a lot of fun coming up with this speech! If I do go on to work the San Diego tour, I might try to rework it so it's a bit more... compact.

13) Back to the Lab - Let's Talk Crap!

Finishing off in the content-heavy lab, I have one big pile of crap to talk about. Or rather, three big piles of crap... Probably even longer than my Stygimoloch speech, this particular round of speeches makes me most proud - if and when I can pull it off!

The thing is, with such a lengthy dialogue, I often found myself being interrupted by the handlers bringing out one of the toddlers, or else I risked losing guests due to the uh, contents...

Without further interruption:

*Approaching a growing group of guests checking out specimens in three round containers at the back of the lab*

"I see some of you have noticed some of our more... unconventional specimens here in the lab. Now, for anyone still uncertain about what they are looking at here, these are, in fact, dino droppings - dinosaur poop. They may look a little out of place here in this immaculate lab, but these specimens are actually very important to our research! It's very important that we know exactly what our animals are eating and just how well they're processing their food. [Moreover, specimens like these can be good indicators of our animals' health; how they're doing out in the field.]"

*At this point, I indicate the specimen furthest from me*

"For example, this is a specimen from one of our herbivores - an animal that only eats plants. Now, uh, not to be too crude, but it doesn't look like this one chewed very well; that tells me it was probably from one of our sauropods like the Brachiosaurus. Sauropods tend to have spoon or peg-shaped teeth that are great for ripping vegetation off - but not great at chewing at all. So they'll simply rip off the leaves and swallow them whole and, well, whatever happens, happens..."

*I indicate another specimen*

"Over here is one from one of our carnivores - an animal that only eats meat. [We can tell that from a few things. First off, the color; meat and bone is high in iron, so when an animal eats another animal, that iron is absorbed and we see traces of that in our samples with this darker coloration.] The most obvious way to tell from this sample is the bits of bone found in it. Those bits of bone actually tell me something else - this had to come from a pretty sizable carnivore. You have to be a certain size in order to break bone and, uh, process and eliminate it the way this one has...

...Probably not our Tyrannosaur, though; Tyrannosaurs have really robust teeth that pulverize bone - that's actually what they're designed to do. I'd say our Carnotaurus left this, if I had to guess..."

*I motion to the last sample*

"Now, this last specimen is from one of our omnivores - an animal that eats both meat and plants. I couldn't tell you which animal left this, but whatever it was, it was having a hay-day! I'm seeing berries, insects... even feathers! So anything this animal came across, it was taking advantage and eating it...

...So, these certainly aren't our most glamorous specimens in the lab, but they do yield quite a bit of information. Thank you all for listening and letting me talk crap!"

Ah, that punch line...

And there's my 13 favorite things I liked to say to guests at Jurassic World: the Exhibition (Denver, 2022)! Here's hoping I get to continue the fun in San Diego!

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