Yes, you are reading that correctly. I was raped. There is no simpler way to put it. It’s something you can’t sugar coat, and make it seem even a little bit okay. Well technically, in better words I like to say I got taken advantage of, or how others say 'I got date raped.' For starters, I’m fine now, and I’ve accepted it. I am comfortable with talking about it now.
For some back story, I was in a very bad place at the time, I was having a hard time coping with different things in life, and I was emotionally unstable from the beginning of the situation. It took place after my Junior Prom. Everyone always tells you "prom is so much fun and magical." Well this was my first prom, and it was nothing like that. Don't worry, I'm going to give you all the details as to what happened.
I rode to prom with my friend and her other friend, and after prom we planned on going to Steak N' Shake, and then going back to my friend's house to do whatever. When we left Steak N' Shake we decided we wanted to go hang out with friends. We ended up going to one of our guy friend's house, and I thought it would be fun, but I had no idea that it would end up the way that it did.
We got there and everyone is drinking. The two girls I came with and I are the only girls, and there are six guys, so I should have known that it was going to be a bad idea. For the record, I rarely ever drank at that point in time, I still do not. So, we were hanging out and I start getting drunk, the drunkest that I have ever been. We find one of our friends weed, and we start smoking it. I have smoked before and I can handle being high around others and I know I take care of myself in that state of mind, but I had never been drunk and high at the same time.
At this point, I'm crossfaded, as they say, and my friends that I came with decide they had to leave, and for whatever reason, I decided that I'm going to stay. They agree to let me stay with six guys, while I’m completely not okay. Here’s where things get foggy for me, but from what videos I have on my phone, and things that I remember, we drank a lot more. I remember us finishing a complete bucket of rum together. I also remember them having to wheel me around on a rolly chair in the garage. I sort of remember going inside the house.
This is where my memory starts to fade in and out. There was four of us that were still up and awake, me and three guys. I remember having to go to the restroom, and one of them helped me into the restroom. I vividly remember telling him to wait outside, but then I remember them coming to the bathroom while I’m sitting on the toilet and them shoving their dicks in my face. Then I remember coming to again in an odd room, but still not able to understand things at the time, with the first guy having sex with me. Then I came to again with the second guy having sex with me. I then remember coming to for the final time completely coherent, and understanding what was going on, with the third guy trying to have sex with me. Before he could I stopped him, and pushed him away, and told him to get the fuck off me. I started to look around, and realized that the other two boys are passed out. The third guy tries to grab at me again, and he starts pulling me, with a strong grip around my arm on top of him. I yank my arm, away from him and threaten to punch him in the face if he doesn’t leave me alone.
I grab my pants and pull them on without any underwear, because I don't know what happened to them. And I scrabble for my phone because I know I need to leave. I tried texting my friend that I know is in the area and he says that he can't leave the place that he's at because he didn't drive there. I sit there for a while trying to figure out what I'm going to do. It's early in the morning when I text my other friend to come to get me. She says that she can, and I beginning looking for my things. I finally find my underwear on the other side of the room, and I put them in my bag. I shove everything in my bag, and go outside to wait because I didn't want to be around them at all. My friend arrives and asks me what happened, and I tell her everything, and I don't think she understood that they took advantage of me. I go on with my day and try to live life normal for the day.
When I get to school Monday, everyone thinks that I just had a threesome. Although no one wanted to ask me, because why would you ask someone about that to there face, because you ask others about it, that weren't even there, right?
I didn't know people knew about it, until my guy friend text me and asked me about it, I told him I would come to talk to him about it and explain. When I went to explain it to him, I started crying. This boy and I weren't extremely close, but I'm sitting here telling him about how I got taken advantage of. He gives me a hug and says, "If anyone says anything to me about it, I'll tell them that the threesome thing isn't true, and that it isn't any of their business. I'm sorry, it will be okay. You'll get through this." I just stared at him and said "thank you" and told him I had to go.
Now, most people know that I got taken advantage of, but no one really talks about it anymore. I've learned to deal with it over time and I try to not think about it anymore. It was just something that happened when I was in high school, that I don't talk about to everyone. Very few people now know about it, and that's okay, they don't need to know.