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The Dark Truth About Being a Woman

by Nancy D 4 years ago in feminism
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The Double Edged Sword

In the movie The Breakfast Club, there is a quote that a friend told me about before I even saw the movie. The quote is said by Allison (the basket case) .

"It's kind of a double edged sword, isn't it? ... Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?".

The fact that this movie (with this quote) was out in popular media in 1985, gives me hope for humanity. At least I know I am not alone. There is something wrong with the way society looks at women and sex. Women aren't suppose to be sexual beings; many people seem to think women don't masturbate. However, they still seem to think of women as someone to have sex with? If they think we don't even touch ourselves in private, why would they think we would enjoy having sex with them?

This painful truth of women and sexuality was engraved onto me all in my high school years. There was anassembly one day at school when a cop came to ... well ... basically talk down to us because we were just teenagers. He warned male students not to do stupid tricks for YouTube and various things like that. When he got to the topic of women taking nude photos of themselves, he simply said "don't do that," in a hesitant tone. The blame was completely put on the young women who had their photos sent around by dozens of teenage boys, the same teenage boys that had to be told not to do stupid stunts for YouTube views.

At the time, I was too young to understand that this cop was wrong. Looking back, I feel like he was even avoiding doing his job due to lack of care for female injustice.

While I can't be sure, I am confident that his comment was from an incident that caught the attention of various journalists and more students than could fill a school district. The incident revolved around a teenage girl who I only knew as "The Screwdriver Girl." This is because there was a video of her masturbating with a screwdriver that circled around so much that she and her family had to move away.

I wish I could say this is the only time I have heard of this kind of thing, but it isn't. I've also personally seen a photo of one of my peers who was clearly way too drunk to know what going on... and she was holding an empty beer bottle in her wahoo. I later saw the same girl at the mall with her family. It was weird seeing her as a normal person after seeing her photo passed around a group like she was worth nothing.

I have an even worse example... At the same school I had a history teacher that was overly involved in coaching rugby, football, and probably another sport... I dunno, I really didn't like him that much. One day in class he told a story about a student who made two false rape charges. Apparently, she was so easy that anyone at a party could give her $5 and she would go to town. One day, a teacher caught her with two boys and they both ran off, so she cried rape. While in court, the two boys stood up and brought a long list of other boys the victim has also slept with. The teacher basically called this teenage girl a whore. Again, at the time I was so young I accepted this as normal. When the truth is, that teacher completely suppressed the female voice.

He also openly called me a loser in class. I'm still bitter about it to this day and it's been more than a few years.

My last point isn't as dramatic as my other points, but it's certainly more common. At yet another student assembly in highschool, a much older woman stood in front of a microphone. Her lips were permanently wrinkled from constantly looking displeased at us and she made direct eye contact with students in the audience as she reminded us about the various rules in the school dress code. One of the rules was no cleavage, which she said as she looked at me. I felt so awkward and uncomfortable that I skipped the rest of the day and went to a friend's class instead of getting an education. It sounds like the system really has their prioritiesstraight to me *sarcasm*.

All of these stories are from high school, a place we are forced to go until we are 16. A place we are judged for if we leave early to get a GED. A place that we are suppose to be grateful for the free education. A place that lacks community and safety.


About the author

Nancy D

Facebook @NancyDBlogging

Twitter @BlogsNancy

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