Persevering through it all

Like many people in society, I have taken it upon myself to binge a lot of awesome and brilliant titles on various platforms. I don’t always base my media intake by the daily recommended suggestions, and usually like to go based on what I’m feeling at any given moment. Lately I have found myself drifting towards more female empowered movies and shows – wanting to show my daughter a different kind of movies or series based on a strong female lead without really a romantic entanglement to eschew their judgment.

One of my constant go-to’s is a movie just released last year – Disney’s Mulan.

I’ve found that I enjoyed the live action portrayal more than I thought I would. I mean, Mulan was one of my favorite movies growing up. It really hit a nerve and I still cry a few times throughout.

It is one of my constant upbeat movies as of late – I mean what’s not to love – family honor, a child’s love for her father, being told that they would never be good enough and still through that they continue on.

At a time when women weren’t allowed to fight for their family and country, Mulan takes up the mantel. She knows she could be penalized or killed and still… she does it anyways.

Now, the live action doesn’t have the comedy of Eddie Murphy in it, nor the catchy musical numbers, but the direction and the cinematography are breath taking. This movie allows us to explore a new culture, ancient China, full of color and history, it was lovely to see.

While growing up I immersed myself into the entire Disney princess catalog – and while I enjoyed everyone (minus Snow White, don’t ask), Mulan was always what I went back to. It was one of the first movies where the hero of the story was a woman – and she wasn’t doing it for the love of a man, in fact, romance placed second and it was only hinted at never fully allowed to bloom.

For me – it sparked something inside me. Like, I didn’t have to have that “knight in shining armor” to save me – I could get off my butt and save myself if I needed to. Mulan spoke to that part of me that I always wanted growing up. Being a girl didn’t mean that I was frail and made of glass and always had to be rescued. Being a girl, means I could be – swift as the coursing river, or use the strength of a raging fire, or even be mysterious as the dark side of the moon. (No promises that I didn’t sing that in my head.)

Mulan shows that it isn’t what was on the outside that mattered, but what was inside – she had the courage to fight and stand up in place of her father, showing that one person can tip the scales set against them. She showed that even though she didn’t have the brute force like most men, she was cunning and quick at problem solving. In the live action – they explained that she had a very powerful Chi and that if she was a ‘woman’ they would call her a witch, but because she was pretending to be a man they let her cultivate it properly. But, in the end pretending to be something that you’re not still weighed her down. She couldn’t truly defend herself against the antagonist (another female warrior/witch) and only once she dropped her fake mantle she was able to fully grow.

Once Mulan drops the act and fully embraces herself was she able to prevail. For a young girl growing up – how powerful is that? Learning to be you – and become the truest form possible can do wonders.

That is what I would want to teach my daughter to strive for in life.

This pulled me into a great number of girl’s kicking butt roles like Brave – another Disney goodie that is totally underrated.

Merida, the heroine, fights for her right to not marry. But also deals with the time-honored motif of a girl at odds with her mother. That trope is something I am beginning to understand, now that I have my own daughter. Wanting what’s best for your child and letting them be free to think for themselves is a constant struggle, even at the simple age of one.

Having dreams for your child is great – but when you push them onto them and demand that they take up your dreams, that isn’t right or fair. In this story – Merida tries to and fails to convince her mother of this at the start – and it takes her mother turning into a bear for them to finally start to understand each other... to finally start to listen to one another.

Merida starts to learn that her mother isn’t pushing this out of spite, but mainly out of love. She wishes for Merida to be taken care of, but what her mother fails to understand is that Merida doesn’t need to be taken care of. She clearly wants to be in charge of herself and decide what is right for her – and not some man to choose for her.

I see this now even talking to my partner about our daughter – we both have ideals and dreams for her, and I hope that I’m going to be fully aware of when to push and when to walk with her in this journey. Because, communication is key and I’m not raising a mini me – I’m raising a full-fledged person whom will have similar ideals (I hope) but in the end will have different dreams and ways of thinking than I and I have to roll with that when it happens.

One last addition I’d love to talk is the hit TV series Buffy the Vampire Slayer – the series not the movie. Though the movie is pretty awesome in itself – but the series is a standalone feature that doesn’t need the movie to aid it.

In this series, it takes a girl (Buffy) and shows how she can kick some butt as well as some awesome tropes from her sidekicks and father figure mentor. Each season tends to grow a little darker and darker as it progresses. The show can go from campy episodes and a dashing musical number, to dealing with grief when a beloved character dies in the next episode.

It shows that even a cheery high school girl can fight through the vile evils of the world and still make it in time for prom (one of my favorite episodes.) Yet still has a human element to it. Saving the world isn’t easy and it takes a toll on her. She gains friendships, love, and heartache – all the while learning and pushing herself to do better, to be better. -Even when she as at her lowest she still never gives up.

Defiantly something that I would love to teach to my daughter – nothing in life will come easy, and if you really want it then you have to push yourself towards it. Failure will happen, but then you still need to get back up and try again – to do better .

All the streaming services have brilliant line ups for whatever you may fancy, but these are my go-to’s for when my daughter is in the room. It’s background noise now, but someday, she will be old enough to comprehend the meaning.

I wish to teach her to always look within herself to find the courage to do what she wants (even if it’s unconventional), to strive to have constant communication with her loved ones, and to (most of all) never give up.