(Men)-strual Cycles.

For years women all around the globe have joked that men could not handle a menstrual cycle. I happen to agree, I mean a lot of guys cannot multitask and there is the blood, cramps, pads or tampons and yes you still have to go to work. This age old discussion was recently brought to my attention when my 12 year old niece wanted to know why men don’t get a period when it’s called MENstruation, She said how can they not get it when there name is at the beginning of it. I thought that was hilarious, but more importantly after over two decades of periods why hadn’t I even thought about that. Who even decided that “Menstruation” would be the title for the process in a woman discharging blood and other materials from the lining of the uterus?

Since this process only occurs in woman it should be called WOMENstruation. However, since men have the title, I think they should also have the process. Although I am told it is scientifically impossible (I’m still checking the facts) it will at least give you a good laugh.

I imagined the biggest strongest muscular man I knew carrying his monster truck tampons in an Axe for men scent.

Then I thought where exactly would they insert it? I guess we can decide that later.

Next, I Imagined that same guy with the bloating and tender breast or facing the overall lack of energy and my personal favorite the bowel issues. Did you know many women experience diarrhea with their menstrual cycles? Now, that seems unfair pooping, peeing, and menstruating all at the same time. I am actually surprised any human can do it, and monthly at that. Just in case you didn’t know the top 10 Menstrual cycle symptoms are:

1. Abdominal cramps

2. Breakouts (Acne)

3. Tender Breast

4. Fatigue

5. Bloating

6. Bowel Issues

7. Headache

8. Mood Swings

9. Lower Back Pain

10. Trouble sleeping

That’s a lot to go through for the process of Menstruation not even to be named after us women. Either we can get men to have periods or we should at least change the name. I took the liberty of coming up with several names that I found to be more appropriate Womenstruation, Hell Week, or my personal favorite the time of the woman. However, according to my research Menstruation actually comes from the word "menses" which is mucosal tissue. Both mucosal tissue and blood are discharged from the uterus lining during your period.

However, here we are again even the word Menses starts with "men". It is astounding how a process that is happening inside the female body is titled "men-" anything. Between Menses and menstruation, men are begging for the responsibility to have a monthly cycle. I don't think they should be deprived of the joys of checking their pads and inserting a tampon. I do wonder though, if men did get to have periods how would the process evolve? Would they come up with super innovative technology and somehow change the entire menstruation game? Would they allow one week off a month from work to relax during their menstruation? I bet there would be new tampon smells too, not florals but strong cologne manly tampon smells.

I recently spoke with a very good male friend of mine on this very subject, and he informed me men would be great at handling menstruation. He said to me, "men naturally have a higher pain tolerance then women", so I probably wouldn't even experience cramps with the same intensity women do". He said the entire process would be a synch for men. I make no comments on whether or not his position is correct or incorrect however, he did convince me once again exactly why men should have menstrual cycles. Simply put, men should have menstrual cycles because they think they can handle the process better. I for one always believe the man for the job is the one who is best suited for it, if they think they can handle it better then they should handle it.

In conclusion men should have periods because their name is all up in it. And, or at least my one friend feels they are bigger stronger and wiser overall better fit to handle any challenge with ease, menstrual cycles included.