The Problem with most Memorial Day Sales

Before I begin, I'd like to point out that these opinions are solely my own based on my experience as a family member and friend of several veterans who had strong feelings about Memorial Day sales. Though these are the opinions of some who have now passed, I am not a veteran and cannot speak for any but those who have provided their opinions directly to me. If you are a veteran and have an opinion about this article, I would love to hear your thoughts as they are more relevant than my own. Please feel free to send them to brittanynunezwritings.com.

The Problem with Memorial Day Sales

Everyone loves a good sale. Flowers on Valentine's day, wrapping paper at Christmas, baskets at Easter, furniture . . . on Memorial Day?

Many in my family and friend groups are veterans. One had such a disdain for Memorial Day sales that he didn't want to buy anything from anywhere when it came. He talked about how it felt to be told "Happy Memorial Day," when he was a living veteran. This was for many reasons.

Memorial Day is often confused with Veterans' Day, so let's clear that up first. Veterans' Day honors all veterans who have served our country. Memorial Day honors are fallen heroes. Here are the main reasons it is difficult to call this a celebratory holiday rather than a day to honor fallen veterans.

Memorial Day is not meant to be joyful

A friend used to tell me the stories of how he lost his friends in combat. The mental images were so horrific to me that I cannot imagine what it was like being there in person. Every veteran honored on Memorial Day has a family who loved them. He said telling them to be happy on that day is insulting and disingenuous. It's said with the same value as "bless you" when you hear a sneeze in that it's a regurgitated type of phrase that automatically comes out on any 'holiday.'

Thanking someone for their service, or expressing sympathy towards a family who grieves the loss of a veteran is one thing. Telling someone it's a happy day to celebrate their loss is completely different.

Memorial Day sales do not honor the fallen, no matter how many flags are on an ad

American flags are one of the most prominent ways to get our attention, even in situations where it may not fit. A company having seven, twenty, or a hundred flags for Memorial Day does not correlate to a 40% off mattress sale. The company is there to trick you into believing it's about Memorial Day by placing American flags all over their ads and websites in order for you to make the purchase and feel a little patriotic. The thing is, who are you helping? Who are they? Their profits are not going to honor our nation's fallen heroes.

Some companies have "Would you like to donate a dollar to (charity name)?" to make us thing they really care. Do they though? Are they donating the money as a company with missions of dollars in profit, or are they asking us to foot the bill so they can look like they care without donating any proceeds?

Without naming the company, one even called their sale a "Memorial Day Blowout." If you're not aware, veteran suicide rates are incredibly high, and you can read more about that here.

One final thing we see very often is "We'll donate x amount up to y amount for every item sold for donations to charities to honor the fallen." Here's the thing though, this is a tactic to get you to buy. If they have that much money exactly to match dollar for item it is because they have that budgeted and put aside already. If they need to guilt trip you into buying so they can make extra profit off of their sales based on a preset, tax deductible donation budget, is it really about Memorial Day?

Ways to honor veterans who have passed on Memorial Day

1. Speak to a veteran who may need someone to talk to. As mentioned earlier, Memorial Day can be incredibly difficult for our living veterans. With depression and suicide rates so high among our veterans and VA taking increasingly longer times to help them, sometimes they need a friend to listen to them talk about their fallen friends.
2. Fix up a grave of a veteran. Find a cemetery with the final resting place of a fallen veteran that is in need of being taken care of. Clean it, get it a flag or some flowers, and pull up weeds.
3. Do something nice for a fallen veteran's family. This is a particularly hard day for them as well. Buying them lunch, checking in on them, and being a friend is a really good way to show you care.
4. Take part in our National Moment of Remembrance. Every Memorial Day at 3pm wherever you are, take just one minute to think about the reason we have this day in silence.
5. Donate to a charity of your choice. Obviously it is difficult to find a way to donate to a deceased veteran in a way that would benefit them. If you are financially able to do so, however, consider donating to a charity that helps wounded veterans. Here are ten great options.
6. If you choose to go shopping on this day, try to find one of the two following options: (1) A transparent company who states exactly how much they are donating out of actual profits for Memorial Day, as well as those who have a dollar for dollar (not dollar for item up to x amount) match, or (2) A veteran owned business.