What No One Is Saying About The Johnny Depp/Amber Heard Trial

So far, I have had to write about six different articles about the $100 million dollar defamation case featuring Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. At this point, I’m assuming that everyone and their grandma has heard about the details.

We all know Amber Heard pooped on Depp’s side of the bed. We know Depp lost the tip of his finger somehow, started writing on walls in his blood, and sent texts to people saying he wanted to “burn Amber.”

Yes, it’s all shocking and yes, it’s all toxic. These two actors basically destroyed their careers faster than anyone else could on the A-list. And how did they do it? They dated each other and let their equally toxic traits take hold.

It’s wild to see people who were once incredibly respected go down in flames right now. Saying they’re both going to be blacklisted from Tinseltown is not an exaggeration. It’s a given.

We’ve heard just about everything that could be said about the abusive nature of their dating lives, but there’s one thing no one is talking about.

It’s about who’s commenting on the scandal.

So, let’s get one thing straight here: everyone has the right to talk about what they want to talk about. And the Johnny Depp scandal is major news. And it’s quite eye-opening news, to some.

Yes, this is one of the rare moments where we see a female abuser — or someone who seems to be the aggressor in a lot of the moments, at the very least. It’s proof that anyone can be a victim of abuse and that abuse is hard to walk away from.

But let’s talk about what’s striking about this conversation. One of the reasons it’s so explosive is because a large portion of the talk is from people who typically don’t give a flying fuck about domestic violence. Okay, so I feel like I should clarify.

A lot of the people who are commenting are standing up for Johnny Depp, and that’s great. He honestly doesn’t seem to be in a good place with this girl, and she’s pretty foul. I mean, she pooped on his bed. Who does that?!

However, I can’t help but notice that a lot of the people who are doing this tend to be the same ones who blame women that get abused by their partners. Or at the very least, they’re the guys who shake their heads, say it’s unfortunate, and drop the subject.

So, is it really about domestic violence? Or, is it about something more — such as getting a cudgel to derail efforts to cut down DV rates for women? Is it a political issue against feminism? Or, is it a matter of something else entirely?

I think it’s a mix, and it’s one that’s worth discussing. Here’s why.

A part of this might be political.

Politics might not be the first thing to come to mind, but there’s reason to believe that this could be a push against feminism. Around 11 percent of all Twitter users discussing this are fake.

We all know how troll farms in Russia tend to rail against feminism as a way to divide Americans. It’s one of the many divisive techniques they used to get Trump elected. So, this could be troll fodder.

But, there are actual misogynists who want to use this as part of the reason to NOT believe female victims.

Not cool, but it’s a thing. A lot of men will stop at nothing to invalidate and rail against women. Having a story like Amber Heard will be a cudgel for many guys who want to invalidate women talking about their stories.

It sucks, but it’s true. And it’s time we acknowledge that there are going to be shitpiles of sorry excuses for men who are gleeful over this. Are they the majority here? I hope not.

The biggest reason for the major wave of people is because it’s showing a side of domestic violence most people don’t see.

The Amber Heard/Johnny Depp case has a lot of seriously thought-provoking moments for people. Are both people abusive? Well, it’s hard to tell whether Johnny Depp’s abuse was reactive, but it’s safe to say that this is not a normal DV case. Here’s why:

Amber Heard came forward and said that Johnny Depp was violent towards her, and we all believed her. When Depp said that he was being abused, everyone didn’t believe him. How did Hollywood treat him when he came forward? Oh, they fucking blacklisted him. Right, Warner Bros?!

Depp came forth and admitted that he was re-creating a shitty relationship he had with his mother. He was clearly shaken. It shows that anyone can end up in the cycle of abuse. More importantly, it’s showing that abuse is something that people can “default” to if they grew up around it. Staying away from abusers isn’t easy!

This is a rare moment where we see a man being open about being abused. Yep, very rarely happens in Hollywood, and we have to be more open about how important it is to have this type of visibility. A lot of men I know — men I’ve even written about — see themselves in Johnny Depp right now.

It’s also a highly complicated trial that shows both of them acting badly. So, I’m not sure if I have made this clear, but I’m leaning towards Team Depp here. However, there is ample evidence of the two of them treating each other like shit. Like, this relationship was a terminal dumpster fire. Regardless, it offers a lot of room for debate.

Regardless of the why, we should be thankful that this trial is highlighting something vital about abuse.

Our society tends to have extreme knee-jerk reactions to domestic violence, which is to be expected. However, we almost all forget that DV isn’t always a clear black-and-white, aggressor-and-victim issue. There are moments where both parties can be the bad guy. That’s why this trial is so hard to untangle.

More importantly, what first seems to be the case with domestic violence rarely ever is the case. In many cases, Depp’s included, the abuser will smear the victim as a way to retain control of the narrative. It’s the final act of abuse — a way to bury the victim’s credibility.

At the end of the day, this trial was a major groundbreaker because it’s helping people wake up to some of the latent misconceptions they held. It’s helping men open up about the abuse they faced, too. For a lot of survivors, it’s cathartic.

Some of the guys who are talking about this are literally just realizing that men can be abuse victims too. So maybe we shouldn’t worry why people are talking and just get the discussion going.