4 Self Care Tips to Practice if You Live With an Addict

Living with an addict is one of the hardest things to do. First, you have people on the outside asking you, “why don’t you just leave” or “why don’t you kick them out?” It might seem that simple - but it’s not. Everyone has their own circumstances and reasoning for why they do the things we do and we can’t always control that.

Regardless of what your circumstances are, if you live with an addict, you know how challenging life can be. From the sleepless nights making sure your friend or loved one is safe to the turmoil and manipulation within the home. You might feel pressured to take care of the addict or alcoholic or try to protect them - but in doing so you may lose contact with your own identity. You may even struggle with difficult emotions and unique situations. Some common effects of living with an addict are:

• Feeling depression, anxiety, stress, guilt, anger, shame, or embarrassment
• Struggling financially due to unpaid bills or debts
• Worrying constantly about the person feeling in danger
• Feeling as though you are not safe and comfortable in your own home
• Being manipulated, having boundaries disrespected, or acting out in enabling behaviors

Unfortunately, you can’t always force someone to get help. That being said, practicing self-care can help you stay mentally and emotionally well. If you’re living with an addict, now more than ever is the right time to practice self-care. Here are 4 ways to do so.

1. Go to a Support Meeting

Although you may feel alone, there are plenty of people who are just like you. Some of which are in your very shoes and some of whom have overcome their struggles. Going to a support group such as Al-Anon will help you find support and resources. Al-Anon is a group that formed as a result of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) to provide a supportive place for family members and friends of alcoholics. By connecting with other like-minded individuals, you will gain companionship as well as a place to turn or guidance when you need help.

2. Take Care of Your Mental, Emotional, and Physical Health

Your sleep schedule, exercise, and diet all affect your mood and mental health. Making sure you are taking care of your mind and body is the entire purpose of self-care, so if you’re not eating a balanced diet, getting enough quality sleep, and exercising, you are neglecting yourself. Other simple ways to care for your mental, emotional, and physical health are meditating, doing yoga, and taking time out of your day to do a hobby or activity you enjoy. Basically, do what you need to do for you so that you don't let your life get consumed in your loved one's addiction.

3. Enforce Healthy Boundaries

Boundaries are vital when living with an addict, and, by enforcing boundaries, you may even push them to seek treatment sooner. Boundaries are firm guidelines that outline behaviors that you will or will not accept. For example, if you refuse to allow drug use in the home, make sure your loved one knows that and understands what the consequences are if they cross this boundary. When boundaries are set, people stop enabling their loved ones, which helps the addicted individual see the gravity of their situation sooner, ultimately encouraging them to seek help.

4. Talk to a Professional

Dealing with an addicted loved one is exhausting and takes up a lot of mental space. If you are living with a drug addict or alcoholic, it may be in your best interest to seek professional help. Although you might think they are the ones that should seek help, you can benefit from it, too. It’s likely that the effects of addiction in the home have affected you in some way in which therapy can help. Therapists can also help give you tips on setting boundaries and letting go of codependent behaviors to further help your addicted loved one.