I Married Just Because

Looking back,

It would have made my life so different if only my dad would have accepted me for who I was. Now I am so blessed to be"Me"

Growing up in the 60s and in the 70s and having the attraction for another man was just forbidden. After all, I was the only son, yes the son who was to marry, have children and carry on the last name.

My dad would sit at the table and go on and on telling me, I had better have sons. Marry a nice young girl and have a big family. He had no idea who I was, what I enjoyed in life and the fact that I was gay.

With three sisters in the house, and I was the only brother we use to have some amazing times. They were my lifesavers, always looking out for me.

My First Real Date

You honestly will not believe it, I had to sneak out the basement window to meet Derek.

Derek and I privately had been dating for two years. We were both destined to leave the little village and move to the big city when school was done.

I really was in love with him, he was my everything. I mean that in every way. Yet the night my dad (who I call Joe) caught us making out in the car, dragged me by my hair and made sure that Derek would never come back again.

After a beating and running away, thanks to the help of my sisters. I had to move to the big city. Sadly I had no way of making ends meet so I ended up back at my parents.

Strict rules, and forced to date our neighbour. Her name was Milly, she was a great friend and we had a lot in common. As a friend, I loved her dearly, but as a lover, nothing felt real.

Married,

I did what I was told, I made "Joe" the happiest man in the world. I did my best to make Milly happy. Deep down inside I always felt dishonest to her, I felt terrible when we made love. I would close my eyes picturing Derek and feeling so sad for her.

We had two children, a boy and a girl. To be honest, Milly gave me two wonderful blessings. Also, her friendship and time with me were amazing. We loved golfing, and hiking the trails and you could not have asked for a better best friend.

Milly's Love

Our children were in their teens and well Milly and I had moved to the big city. "Joe" had passed away, and Milly wanted the two of us to go away for a weekend.

The weekend was up at a cottage in the mountains. Milly seemed anxious but really wanted to go and have a talk.

We hiked up the mountains and canoed around the lake. We laughed and talked about the kids and how fast they had grown up.

It was that night when we had the biggest talk ever. It turned out to be one of the most magical nights ever.

Milly wanted to tell me how sorry she was, that she had not been honest with me. I felt confused and told her that I had not been honest with her.

Looking at each other, puzzled about what the other was going to say.

I went first and told her that I was gay, that since we married she was the only person I was with. I told her I loved her but not in a romantic way.

Milly could not believe it, not that I was gay. The true story was Milly was gay too. With tears in our eyes, two best friends who had two amazing children and now had the freedom to love, love who they wanted to love.

Our parents, my mom and her mom both were so happy that we had finally been able to share the truth. They both loved us and excepted us for who we were. Apparently, my mom excepted me right from the beginning but she too feared my dad.

Our Talk With The Kids

We raised two remarkable children. They kind of already knew. We honestly did not see that coming.

After the talk, we learned that our daughter was gay and was going to tell us before leaving for college. We all hugged and it was wonderful to talk openly and share our feelings. The right to be who we are and not be forced to be someone that we are not.

Milly And I

We will always be the best of friends. We even go out from time to time or play a round of golf with our wonderful partners.

Our life is wonderful, we are the happiest we have ever been. We hope that you allow yourselves to love who you want to love, to be who you want to be. "Most of all be happy."