Why Does this Matter?

I put my hands palm up in the water

I spread my fingers apart and pull up

The water between my fingers disappears into the vast ocean

Just like we will do

It feels less like letting go and more like something being taken

Its gone as fast as it came

But the space between my fingers is empty as if it was never there

And that's the part of letting go we dread

The grief

We already know about the grief

I've already talked too much about the grief of letting go

The thing is that you can do it

The thing you don't want to do more than anything, the thing that you think will hurt the most

It can be done

Then the smile will come

The tears will dry

The darkness will not be so dark anymore

The light will not have pockets of sadness

The intricacies of the flowers, the clouds, the cats meow, will all have deep meaning again

The odd connections and coincidental dates will bring you material to tell a quirky story again

Your voice will never let a tune go by without joining in

Your pen will write about joy instead of gut-wrenching horrors that would scare someone away

Though you can laugh through that realization, it's scary and you know it

When you visit the ocean it will make your heart soar instead of long

One day you will smile and leap at things again

The same way you grin and your heart flutters over hearing Scar Tissue

Your heart will be in the right place

Even if you think it cannot be done

Even if you sneak away to let some tears fall in the midst of company

They say the best way to hold onto something is to let go

Your dreams will mean something again

Holding on by a thread only lasts for so long

The thread will break

So just let it go