Who am I

Today I awoke when I should not have.

I looked all around me and just saw the staff.

Scenes of a hospital are all around me.

Apparently, someone heard my plea.

They called for help and now here I am.

Wondering why someone would give a damn.

I obviously don’t and am wondering who.

Who should I be so I am not so blue.

This version of me is not what I want.

Am I a friend, a worker, a sister, or an aunt?

The list of identity toys with my brain.

So overwhelming, it is difficult to explain.

In the mirror I look and am sad what I see.

I have no idea, who is this version of me?

In this girl’s eye there is a small twinkle of hope.

I will latch onto this thought and not be a dope.

I can be who I want but I have to be strong.

The version of me serving others has gone on for too long.

Slowly I find help in discovering my being.

I can stand up to others and stop all the fleeing.

The face in the mirror it is beginning to change.

She no longer looks distant as well as strange.

I can be who I want without recourse from others.

The peace that comes with not feeling smothered.

This is a cycle I have learned as I grow as a human.

When the pain becomes too much, I must take the room in.

And let the cracks and crevices grow until the shell is gone.

Letting the new version come out, oh so strong.