Which Can?

Which can?

Which can I be? A strong independent woman?

Or this tired, unmotivated mass?

Which can I see? A bright, shining future full of dreams?

Or this never-ending mundane list of tasks?

Which can be done? The path leading to my powerful destiny?

Or this trail of tears in the wake of my mourning?

Which can be undone? The endless hours of inward thought and self-reflection?

Or the damage wrought from years of self-scorning?

Which can be mine? A loving family with years of laughter and smiles?

Or an eternity of loneliness by my side?

Which can I define? The life I wish to lead, with a strong, powerful, loving destiny?

Or whatever this is, where I find myself, afraid, as I hide?

Which can I have?

Which can I know?

Which can be unlearned?

Which can I do?

Which can be heard?

Which can be made?

Which can be taught?

Which can I create?

Which can go on?

Which can come back?

Which can help me?

Which can make me whole?

Which can the future bring?

Which can the past hold back?

Which can…?

Which can…?

Which can…?

I don’t know!

I have no answers for these questions. I cannot see the future. I cannot erase the past. I try to hold myself together. To get to the woman I want to be. It is taking so long. I don’t know if I can hold out. I can keep trying. What else can I do?