War Weary

Home ... So far away... So wonderfully close

I see it in the photo

I carry in my wallet

In the bottom of my rucksack

Where my spare socks lie

The photo I pull out whenever I feel dispirited ...

I feel it whenever I look at my rifle

Cleaned, oiled, ready, dangerous ...

Here on this unfamiliar ground I make my stand

Ready to defend my family so far away

On the other side of this ball of dirt

So that I don't have to do it on my front stoop

****************

When the morning reveille is called

I stand for it

I stand for home, Mom, Dad, wife, kids

Turning my gaze to the flag

Which waves in the breeze

It waves for home

It waves for life, love, loneliness, duty, sacrifice

When the Pledge of Allegiance is sang, I Cross my heart for it

***********************

When I see the foreign faces

Full of hope, wonder, longing...

Interspersed amongst those full of hate, suspicion, apathy

I see the faces of my life

Those eyes on the stooped grandmother... they look like my wife's

That pert nosed little girl has my daughter's smile

The aging grocer, bent from years of backbreaking labor

Reminds me of my grandfather

Except for the dark eyes and missing teeth

The bar girl asking me to buy her a drink

Reminds me of my sister

Back home working hard to help pay the bills

For them I am here

***********************

As I enter the bustling command center

I breathe in the smoke from the fuel stove

As I would the hearth fires of my youth

Woodsmoke, bacon frying, pancakes..., warmth, safety

I am here for those .. because of those things

I am here to ensure such comforts continue unabated

*********************

I will sacrifice my life if necessary for their safety

But mostly I will carry home wherever I go

Across this wide world

Seeking safety for my nation, my friends... my loved ones

I will carry it in my rucksack

I will put it on with my helmet

I will load my ammo pouch with it

I will do my duty

As my home is in my heart

As I am in its

Not for patriotism ... while I love my country

But for those I keep safe

By facing the danger in their stead

I miss you all