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You are the mother that I've missed...

By Meltem ARIKANPublished 3 years ago Updated 3 years ago 2 min read

My heavy heart, full of feelings,

carried by the wind...

What? Why? Where?..

I ask into the distance,

my sour heart, silent inside...

In the darkness of night,

I’d hear the cries of falling stars.

I’d listen to the waters,

not understanding the replies...

I’d look up to the skies.

Could the clouds carry me?

Alone for years, my emotions tangled?

If I surrendered to the wind,

could it take me to where I belong...

What? Why? Where?..

Unknowingly scattered.

Feeling I belong to a place where I’ve never lived...

Not feeling like a stranger in a strange land,

even I don’t understand the language...

Me... My shadow...Shadows...

Me? Which me?

The pain in my veins, in my breath,

in my eyes, possessing my tongue...

My aching teeth...

The anger and pain in my teet,

inside me, in my gut...

Can I birth pain?

If only I could gather enough pain,

I’d birth it, and this would all end...

To be in as much pain as giving birth.

Relieving pain with pain...

Forget about sensibly explaining things,

all the things I’ve learnt.

Tell stories using the magic of words.

The world changed with tales,

maybe it’ll change again.

Give its power to my words.

Take a deep breath...

Don’t be afraid...

I’m in Wales...

Forget about which language I'm speaking.

Forget about which language I'm supposed to speak.

Forget about which language I want to speak.

I can go beyond what one language can say with words...

Maybe being without language...

No words, just the tongue of nature...

No words, just the rhythm of emotions...

No words, just the meaning of what I perceive...

At times, against my will,

waterfalls stream inside me.

I don’t know a way to stop it

because I'm not used to it.

At times against my will

A warm feeling surrounds my heart,

I don’t know how to cool it

Because I'm not used to it.

At times, against my will,

the voice of nature reaches

into my hidden depths

that I’ve held back

It leaves you petrified.

I can’t stop my tears from falling,

because I'm petrified.

At times, against my will, life pushes me...

So that I can give birth to myself.

To walk this land step by step...

The feeling of belonging growing bigger each step of the way.

The nature of this land is calling my name, the wild woman within me...

Just like Wales, I was suppressed.

They tried to shape both of us...

I’m here in Wales.

Where I’ve always wanted to live,​​

in this land that I feel I belong to..

I find myself looking toward the mountains

yearningly from far away,

I feel the secent of the burning hay in my nostrils

At the edge of the meadows,

while my hands caress the horses

I remember my moments of happiness.

I listen to Nature...

I let my emotinos show with the language of the wind

Beyond words I have been taugh...

I discover myself

with my own emotions

with my own simplicity

I see myself, in my own eyes

within my emotions.

I discover myself

with my own simplicity

within my own simplicity...

Thank you, Wales!..

Maybe you’re the mother that I’ve missed...

nature poetry

About the Creator


I'm an author. I written 11 books and five plays. I was short-listed for the Freedom of Expression Award for my play ‘Mi Minor’, because of this play, I had to leave Turkey live in Wales and Turkish court seeking life sentences for me

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