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"Dear Adi, dropped by your house today hoping that you'd be there.

I know you think all I have done to you is wrong and unfair

But I want you to know that I care, even though you said I couldn't

And I shouldn't even dare dropping by, I know I shouldn't...

I just feel vexed and confused, you broke out and flew,

I don't know who should feel used, if it is me or you.

You change your mind seconds apart, I can't keep up with it.

I tried to fight, so did your heart, I don't know which one quit.

Stop asking if I love you! I really haven't got a clue.

It's like you shove me in a pit, then make it all about you.

Funny enough, I did love you back when I was denying

But the outcome of complying just seemed oddly terrifying...

You were too sure, too intense, too serious, decided.

So I can say, in my defence, that my feelings were undivided

But that certainty you had sent me through waves of echoed doubt

And that, in turn, had made you mad while you were fading, acting out.

And then...he showed up, unexpected and you're the one who made it happen.

He lit my sky, you were rejected and so, your clouds began to blacken.

I know this will likely seem like the most awful thing to say

But he was there shining a beam while I was pushing you away...

I knew my part, I know it hurt but I don't know what's next to come.

You threw your heart, you're low and curt, you just wish you were fully numb.

But wait...What am I saying? I can't know how you feel...

I just hope the price you're paying will give you time and strength to heal..."

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"Hey there...I saw you passing by, but I just shut the blinds.

You know I hate asking you why we always hurt each other's minds.

Whatever has been done to me, you're not to blame, okay?

If ever careless you will be, I'll light a flame in clay.

You're right, I often change my mind and panic when I do

But I can say, true and unfeigned: I was so sure of you...

You always led me to a stage where I'd think we're in love...

And then, you'd either flip the page or change what we spoke of.

I had a choice, to leave or stay so I just flew away

But all I did was to delay you finding back a way.

So I turned madness into solace, found comfort in insanity.

I summoned sadness, it was lawless, it had no shame or symmetry.

Him showing up, me finding out, blackened my vision, not my 'clouds'.

It filled my cup, enhanced my shout, just like emotion overcrowds.

And every time I think about how I'm to blame for...him

Everything's starting to fade out, creating shame within.

So I began to look for you in every girl I met.

Initially, I had no clue about how far I'd get

At cross-comparing each of them with my version of you...

I'd try to reprogram their minds to think just like you do...

When I have seen what I have done, I searched the opposite.

My heart was keen but my soul gone and my brain obstinate.

I know I failed in both attempts, hopeless was my approach,

My screams were veiled by strange events and words of cruel reproach.

And now I'm just...alone and you're right there with him,

My strategy has blown due to a foolish whim.

You couldn't know for sure how I would feel,

I just hope I ensured what seemed concealed..."