Underarm Hair

I think of wrinkled noses and sneers

at something I think is unfair.

I’m speaking here, quite specifically,

of feminine armpit hair.

Now don’t get me wrong, shaving’s okay

to be tidy and neatly hirsute,

But I say off the cuff, enough is enough;

under arm fluff can be cute.

Think of a figure all lithely and sweet,

bathing in warm summer sea;

raises eyes to the sky, arms over head,

and armpit curls flutter free.

(And what about men with bear-like chests

who never contemplate wax?)

So, I’ve done some reading on the whole hairy issue

to get down to the hairy brass tacks.

Wiki has a very good read of the what

and the when of armpit hair.

Wik tells me its name, of axillary fame

and post puberty we’re no longer bare.

We shave it away, culturally speaking

to satisfy aesthetic prospects

yet we’re doing away, Wikipedia says,

one thing that stimulates sex!

Axillary hair also helps out where

the friction of swinging arms chafe.

But in some world regions, where health is concerned

it literally might be unsafe!

In the year 1888, so early a date, saw the invention

by some clever chum

who developed a plan to spray under his arm

a thing he lovingly dubbed “Mum”.

So, if smell’s not an issue, it’s just how it looks,

then aesthetically speaking it’s plain.

Shaving can hurt, waxing’s just cruel

and you’ve really got nothing to gain.

The hairiest armpits are not hippy tricks

or feminist-only domain.

I’ll spurn the razor, the Nair and the grazer

and my underarm hair will remain.