Today’s Weather Forecast

The weather report for the day is all over the shop

The prediction for the kitchen is hot and steamy,

But when does that ever change, never I’ve heard

It bodes well with our tastebuds, spicy and creamy.

***

The main bedroom will see snow in the late hours

The temperature dropping below zero in the night,

Make sure you sleep in your woolies and ski boots

You’ll need them to manoeuvre out the door, it’s tight.

***

The children’s bedroom is set to drizzle for hours

Turning the floors to a slushy mud, to their delight,

Order of the day will be raincoat and tall gum boots

As they cook us their mud pies, eaten without a fight.

***

The bathroom, well I don’t know why I even bother

The weather forecast is always the same every day,

Always a touch on the damp side with lots of humidity

This is the optimum temperature, wouldn’t you say?

***

The enclosed sun room, now that’s so disappointing

Today’s forecast is overcast clouds, dark and grey,

I was hoping to sun bathe and relax with a good book

A forecast unusual for August, it’d better suit May.

***

The problem area in today’s forecast is torrential rain

A low is situated right over the top of the living room,

It’s due to sit for a few days, throwing water our way

And it’ll intensify with lightening, thundering booms.

***

Expect local flooding through the entire living room

If the sofas are covered in water, please do not sit,

As high tide nears, we will see waves over the sofas

Steer clear of this room until after the worst has hit.

***

I know you’ll be tempted to stand in the door way

But take care as it’s a severely dangerous situation,

Even the picture frames have sprouted waterfalls

And the light fittings are dripping with condensation.

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Originally posted on Medium