TIGERS TEETH, SEA AND ME

i swear sometimes i

wanna stay lying on the floor

the light goes off

but the fog sticks, and lingers (the brightness i will ignore)

i swear i wanna get up

but the dark is sometimes better

i swear i wanna get up but

i can't really find an answer

nobody’s making me

angrier than i used to be

but fuck, i’m feeling weaker

something over your shoulder

sinks its teeth 'til you can’t breathe

something dragging you under

what if I just let it take me?

couldn’t i just make a home

from the dark stains?

all the bleedin’

sticking on the rocks people have thrown towards me

the road i lie in

and the mess I live through?

is only showing a line of

half the comfort that i crave

like a box of glass i

want to tear my face in

people honestly think that i

can wake up with all of my dreams

no, i’m sorry i’m faking

i can't believe im under

underneath

the rocks pulling me under

will i make it to the beach?

where the rocks come without sticky

dark things that hang on

making sure you gnash your teeth

bloody and weak

i can believe i'm under

i'm back where i wanna be

sometimes i want it to be darker

just so i can go to sleep

so i can go to sleep

leave me be

leave me in peace

(no, i’m sorry you won’t find me)

(i’ll make sure i’m hiding)

(never found someone like me)

(will it ever stop hurting? hurts just to be free.

will i ever stop feeling? (destroyed by the sea).

(when the waves that punch me, start echoing in my sleep)

(dreams are tigers watching, waiting with bracing teeth)

(and the hunters that find them)

(i swear they’ll never find me)

(no, you won’t find me) (unless you look underneath)

is it bad i want the

tigers sharpened teeth

would i be mad to say that if

i saw it’s jaws coming for me

i’d be relieved all over

no more nightmares no more grief

but then i wake up with the

fucking

feeling of fatigue

the tiredness i live with

will drag me to the sea

from

anything i try to

ever really be

what’s better than the darkness?

i don’t know

don’t ask me

some people want fire

i want a hole dug beneath

i could want fire

cause i don’t want to breathe

some people make me sick with envy, deep and green

i can hide it easily but

some people can dance with

no holes punched in their insides

no one wants the cut out

that couldn’t even go without sleeves

nobody wants the one who thinks of nothing but sleep

peeling of skin rages behind

can i look inside your mind?

what if i found it the same?

no, that’s not likely

covered in thorns growing on my face

what if i told you i’m a liar?

what if i told you i don't want to change?

i’m not saying i’m scared but

i’m not saying i feel like me

the thing i’m scared about is

not knowing how to be clean

does anyone know that

i want to lie down

and find an ancient tree

in the back of my mind

it’s where i really want to be

upstairs and out of sight

no windows

no way to be seen

cocooned by walls

i make when i want to be free

what if this is what i am? then

the truth is i’m unclean

wouldn’t bother bleaching

these bones wrapped by twigs

leave the tiger to its meal

cause i swear the last thing

i’ll ever fucking be

is lying down with

the feeling of relief

swallow me whole

there’s barely anything left

for it’s teeth

maybe then i can breathe

maybe then you could see

i bleed happily so you can

see me

sea and me