We made sex a very small thing,
tucked it inside one bedside drawer
(the bottom one),
neatly sanctioned to an act:
"the act of sex."
not to be confused with the verb
to act, as in, to perform.
.
Then we made sex a very large thing
by filling up the space around it
with all it is not, like polite conversation
nor a way to talk to God—no holy deed,
"doing the deed,"
not be confused with the document
which permits its doing.
.
But sex is berry-picking,
sex is that cardinal singing on the branch,
sex is your first dandelion wish,
sex is the estuary
where she's brackish and brimming,
sex is the horny pit of a juicy plum.
A deer shits sex, for fuck's sake.
.
And now I know, too,
sex is this grief when it geysers,
like when I am on my knees,
becoming liquid, immersing into
the thorn-grip snare
and throbbing pulse
of such enormous longing.
.
And lately, I can insert my index
and middle fingers into
the air, and even when it's windless,
my tickled skin knows,
my lower-belly fire knows
we are each the wellspring,
the air and me.
.
Last night I got angry and hollered
in my closet, at a neat row of uniforms:
to live erotically is the most quintessential
expression of innocence!
and that was sex, too, because I was breathy
after and cackling at the universe crammed
into the bottom bedside drawer.
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