There's A Hole

There's a hole in my heart. You left it when you decided you didn't want to be in there anymore.

One day, without knowing exactly when, you worked your way in there. It wasn't easy, there was a wall around my heart. You persisted, you climbed and you cuddled up all warm and comfortable inside.

The thing is, once you found your way in, I didn't want you to leave. I quite enjoyed having you in there. You even went to work repairing the other hole that was left by the last person. A hole so big, I had to create the wall because there wasn't enough patchwork in the world to protect that hole.

I guess I got too comfortable, I started to feel safe. With you inside, I began to dismantle the wall. After all, who better to protect my heart than the one inside, repairing it.

My mistake was that I believed you when you said you wouldn't break it. Maybe you meant it when you said it. But you shouldn't have said it. As someone once said, "don't make promises you can't keep."

For a long time, I blamed myself. I decided it must have been something I did to make you run away. The truth is, it didn't really matter what I did or didn't do, if you wanted to stay, you would have.

Instead, there's a "you" shaped hole in my heart. You put it there when you decided my heart wasn't your home anymore.

It feels different this time. The hole is there, but the wall wasn't rebuilt. Instead of hiding the tears and scars, they are open for anyone to see.

While there's hope that your hole will someday be repaired, there is zero expectation it will be done by anyone but me.