The worst kind of apple

Where to begin?

Where to make haste?

Well first off

I gotta tell ya'

I really do hate the taste.

"The flavors bad!"

I'll admit that.

I'll shout.

If you shove it in my mouth

I'll surely spit it out!

"But it's the best!"

"Great when fresh!"

The statement they make.

Not for me,

Sir, no please. I will simply not partake.

So acidic

It eats You

As You eat it

Burn calories?

I'll eat grapefruit to stay fit.

"They're so sweet!"

"And juicy too!"

Is what they all have to say.

Their best purpose, for what I think

Is so Spongebob has a mortgage to pay.

A wives tail myth

Some urban lore

People tell me before a date

To drink a gallon

In case we mate

"Oh, for real?"

As I facepalm.

I don't buy it.

I stay calm.

Cause most people eat a poor diet.

They all swear that it's the truth

Thanks to this magical, yellow, fruit

It's always their top suggestion

So I ask them

A few more questions

"Why this drink?"

They still hector.

"Won't other juices change the flavor?

Why are you so concerned about my nectar,

unless it's me you wish to savor?"

Now, I'm fine with tons of fruit.

Let it be known

If You never want to hear me whine

Just please, for the love of food

Give me an apple that's not of pine.

People put it in everything

They think it's a delight

No, I don't think its nice

That they treat it like a seasoning

They treat it like a spice.

I'd rather have lemons

Or even some fresh squeezed lime

Putting pineapple in every dish

Is a culinary crime

To have it off the menu, would be my simple wish.

Cooking is an art

And there's a science to the meals

Yet some cooks are gambling with dice

When they always mix in pineapple

Into a dish that has rice!

Yes, I know I'm going to complain.

When on a trip back from Hawaii

We were served dinner on a plane

The chicken dish was delighting

But when I tasted chunks of pineapple, I nearly went insane!

I hate this fruit.

I hate its pricks!

I hate its taste!

It makes me sick!

Adding it to a meal just makes it a waste!

There is no mistake

This fruit I simply hate

If You want to fight me, I don't care if we grapple

Because this fruit simply is

The worst kind of apple