The Last Breath

Oh, my dear,
Do you have any idea
How it feels to carry this pain?
To wake with a heart already weary,
As though each sunrise asks for more
Than I have left to give.

To race against my own mind and heart,
Watching them pull me in opposite directions,
Tearing me apart,
Leaving pieces of who I was
Scattered where hope once lived.

Every breath feels borrowed,
Every smile rehearsed,
Every silence louder,
Than the words I never found the courage to say.

These endless battles of hunger,
Not only for food,
But for comfort,
For understanding,
For someone to see me
Without asking me to explain my wounds.

Tell me,
Could it be easier?
Or is this all I've ever wished for?
To survive long enough
To mistake suffering for home?

I cannot tell anymore.
The lines between living and merely existing
Have faded into one another,
And I no longer know
Which side I stand upon.

Your heart has become a distant shore,
Your soul, a sky I can only admire
From miles below.
The walls between them
Rise higher than mountains,
Built from unspoken words,
Forgotten promises,
And fears we never dared to name.

No matter how loudly I call,
My voice returns to me
As nothing more than an echo,
A reminder that love can exist
Even where it cannot reach.

Still,
Some fragile part of me remains,
Holding on to the smallest spark,
Wondering if one day
You'll hear the cracks in my silence
Instead of the strength I pretend to wear.

And if this should become
My last breath,
Know that it carried your name
More gently than the wind,
More faithfully than my own heartbeat.

Because even as I was breaking,
Even as the darkness learned my face,
A part of me never stopped
Reaching for you.

Though my hands could not touch yours,
And my voice could not cross the distance,
My love remained,
Quiet, unwavering,
Like the final flicker of a candle
Refusing to surrender to the night.

So if you ever think of me,
Don't remember only the pain.
Remember that, despite it all,
I loved you with every piece of my shattered soul,
Until my very last breath.