I was sitting in bed watching Dawson’s Creek,
Drinking wine, eating chips, and relaxing at the end of the week.
Suddenly through the window I see a flash, I feel a boom, and I hear a crash.
I walk outside to check out the commotion,
When I see a feminine figure, confidently in motion.
She’s strutting towards me, a ponytail bouncing up and down,
She’s got on platform sandals and a spaghetti strap slip gown.
Her eyebrows are thin and her lip gloss is heavy,
But there’s something not right and I start feeling unsteady.
As she gets closer, the fear starts to set in.
She looks less like a Rachel, and more like a Marvin.
Her skin is green, her eyes are large,
She walks up to me and says
“Like, who’s in charge?”
I say “well that would be me, I own this land.”
She responds “that’s so not what I mean, talk to the hand!”
“Well I guess that would be the president, but he’s up the coast. Is there something I could help you with?”
“Yeah, I’ve seen your shows.
I’ve done all my research, I’ve read the historical texts,
From Dawson to Buffy, the Charmed Ones, and the rest.
I know about your culture, the leaders and their abilities,
I know about Beverly Hills, Sunnydale, Capeside, your capital cities.
I’ve come for a chance to join and live like you do.
I’ve done the work to be all that,
And a bag of chips too.”
I furrow my brow and think of how to help, what I can do,
She adjusts her oversized scrunchie and taps her chunky shoes.
“Do you need a license? A visa? Those could help, right?”
“I can figure that out on my own, what I need is a prom night.
It’s a rite of passage in your human lives,
With a committee and planning and a dress, it’s a perfect night.”
“Prom!” I exclaim, confused and excited,
“That’s important to you? I guess I can try it!”
“I need to be queen” she said with her head held high,
“It’s in all your movies, and I need the perfect guy.”
So I do it, I plan it, I put on a tux.
I clean up my yard, I make some punch.
I dress up my cat and some stuffed animals,
I get a corsage, a crown, and a disco ball.
I lead her out and dance all around,
My neighbors peek out their windows,
It’ll be the gossip around town.
I call her name and celebrate the queen,
My new friend cries, thrilled to be a proper teen.
She thanks me and leaves, I’m not sure where she’ll go next,
Will I see her again? Will I remember? Could I forget?
But one thing I do know, I never could have dreamed
The time I danced with my 90s extraterrestrial prom queen.