I am grateful for my fingernails,
They give me something to do,
Whether I am happy,
and sometimes when I’m blue,
You see sometimes I get a bit excited,
And they are just there waiting to be devoured,
They cure my anxiety temporarily,
Look, I don’t do it ALL the time (yes I do!)
But if I didn’t have them,
My fingers would probably
Be raw red,
So it’s part of the master’s plan,
To have that little bit of wriggle room in-between
And for that I’m highly grateful
As I spit out a mouthful -
(I don’t do that I swear! Shut-up okay - you probably do!)
But, have you ever tried to bite your toenails?
Me either,
I’m just asking for a friend!
And on that note, I have ten friends,
One on each finger,
That grow back even thicker!
This piece of writing is disgusting,
but it has to be said,
There’s a time for manners,
But not ‘till I’m dead.
***
This was Novel’s mini challenge. You can also read her amazing entry below about sight! It’s a soul enriching piece.
“My_?__makes my life meaningful. 💖 💗 💓
What one thing makes your life most meaningful? What gives you the most joy when you wake up each morning? Answer with a short poem if you are so inclined to sing a thankful song.”
About the Creator
Grz Colm
Film and TV reviews, 🎞 as well as short stories and free verse poems.
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Comments (24)
Grz I love this!! It’s relatable and most importantly hilarious!!! Great work!!
Lol. That was hilarious. But, yuck. 🤣
LOL!!! Gross & humorous at the same time!!! Loving it!!!
🤣🤣 no comment on the toenails. I do admit to chewing both my fingernails and my actual fingers though 🫠🫠 it does help with the anxiety!
This had be cringing and laughing! Nicely Done!
I can now see sports players eat a lot of sunflower seeds. Our anxiety, sure can get the best of us, we developed comforting habits in the process.
This was great, I tell my 14 year old to stop chewing her nails all the time. Incredibly funny prose especially the inner monologue parts. Well done!
Hahaha! This is hilarious!!! Somehow you managed to write a beautiful piece about fingernail (toenail😵) biting. 😂 Favorite line: “Look, I don’t do it ALL the time (yes I do!)” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
My daughter, who is 30, has recently stopped biting her fingernails. She is so proud of them now. Lovely descriptive poem! 💙👍😊
I used to have this habit when I was a kid. But I managed to kick it because I love long nails 🤣🤣🤣
My older brother chewed his nails so mom decided to give him a nickel every time she had to trim them. With the kind of logic that could only belong to a child, I objected declaring it wasn't fair he should get a nickel when the rest of us didn't. She answered, "But you don't chew your finger nails." I responded, "But I could," & promptly began to gnaw on them. I continued biting my finger nails all the way through four years of college & beyond. Never did get a nickel for having to have them trimmed.
🤣 OMFG… I don’t have words. Just laughter. This was too clever.
Supercute!
Oh no this was equal parts funny and disgusting 😂 I would genuinely rather see you pick your nose than bite your nails haha
Hahaha so funny. This is such a funny piece — more, more!
good work. I used to bite my nails.
Well done... not the nailbiting...but the writing about it was superb and very amusing. I have to admit I just want to lock gloves on your hands, though💙Anneliese
I literally LOLd. This was superb.
Couldn't help but laugh omg you captured it!
Ugh. Disgusting. Well done.
OMG OMG OMG OMG etc. This is great. Now it is on, Grz. I hope everyone tries to top this one. Thank you for this, so you can write poetry quite well it seems. Amazing.
I love that you made me laugh out loud this morning. Thank you.
I love this, lol! I'm also a chronic nailbiter. Very witty and unique poem
bahahahahaha. This is genius. I didn't even know about Novel's challenge. The muncher...hahaha. This is actually very clever and I love the arguing with yourself in brackets, the strangely engrossing AI image and the lightly disgusting taste it left in my mouth!