Sweet Honey Paradise

I want so much for myself,

Is that selfish of me?

I want this bright lit apartment

Full of blankets and crystals hanging in my windows

I want mugs and a record player

I want a beautiful satin robe hanging on a hook near my bed

And roses in vase on the table beside it

I want paintings all over my walls

And warm water for chai, always boiling

I want rosewater and ivy scented candles forever burning

And endless beautiful handmade soaps to choose from

I want sweet smelling perfumes with flowers soaking inside of the fragrance bottles

And I want sweet honey in my cabinets

And I want this love

This growing, consistent love

I want to run my fingers through his beard

I want to curl up with him in the mornings while we listen to Santo and Johnny

Focus on my caramel fingers

Laying on his milk colored chest

I want to make him laugh

And kiss him whenever I want

I want to stumble in and out of local bars

And walk home with him, drunk

I want to feel safe in his embrace

I want this beautiful life

That's simple...that's gentle

I've created this never-ending luxury in my mind

This wonderful paradise that doesn't yet exist

And yet there I stay, keeping reality out

Is that wrong?