Subtly Alone

Subtly alone

With no-one knowing

Outwardly the life and soul

But inwardly atoning

***

The smile I smile for others

To take me at face value

The sins I sinned so long ago

Inside they still berate me

***

Once upon a time

I was happy and carefree

But then without realising it

I hurt you and that hurt me

***

Now, even though you’ve moved on

And found someone new

The pain I caused you then

Eats away at me still

***

Is it simply jealousy

At seeing that you’ve moved on

Thinking we’d still be together,

If I hadn’t done you wrong

***

Or do I punish myself

And cry inside my head

For the pain I caused you

When you found another in our bed

***

I can’t say which is true

But without you I am alone

Happy on the outside,

But inside I atone.