Step By Step Directions For Disappearing Into The Void

Common misnomers concerning the void

And a few unknown myths of the fray

Facts to know about the unemployed

When you've decided you want to step away

Get out, get away, get yourself indisposed

Distinguished, doused or dead

Here is a list, if I might, propose

Try to remember what you read

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Firstly:

Throw away the bread crumbs

If you're not planning to come back

Drive your car down to the slums

Maintain the prose of a carjack

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Secondly:

Turn off your phone

Better yet, you'd might as well destroy it

They can ping you with a drone

And where you're going, you won't need it

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Thirdly:

Consider ransacking your place

Leave a desperate selfie on your profile

With scratches all about your face

And for God's sake, don't you smile

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Fourth,

(very important)

Don't forget to set the scene

A night or two before you leave

Be sure the neighbors hear you scream

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Fifth:

A shot of whiskey

Liquid courage always helps

Don't forget to hide the key

For when the police come by to check

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Sixth:

You'll need to be spontaneous

Buy a discount ticket to the beach

Be sure to use an alias

And watch for cameras, they're a Bi@*!

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Lastly, and most importantly....

Change your name and change your hair

You'll find it's easier to get deported

When they realize you're leaving here

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Good Luck