Stains on the soul

You plunged your dirty hands

Inside my soul

Not stopping until you had tainted every core of my body;

My spirit

Yet you called it love, you were doing me a favour,

By purging me clean

Of all those previous demons.

Now you are the only thing to run through my bloodstream

Slowly poisoning me from the inside.

My blood now runs black

It’s so cold inside of me now,

You’re not satisfied until I scream your name

Into the night,

Where no one can hear my internal, pitiful calls for help

Instead they become lodged in my throat.

I wonder if you want to hear them

Will they sound beautiful to you reverberated into the night’s sky.

My weak pleas of stop, keeps falling short

In the end you have to choke them out of me

They fall at our feet

Heavy and awkward.

You just laugh

Like it’s the funniest thing in the world

When you turn to smile back at me,

I realise that your teeth are daggers

Your hands blades, that cut deep.

You will fold me up for the night

Ready to use me again in the morning

Apologising for your behaviour

Anyhow,

It’s too late

I am not quite me anymore

And even if you don’t want to admit it,

You’re not quite you anymore.

You left bruises in the shape of handprints

With jagged scars that run as deep as the ocean,

You have become my living nightmare,

My daily battle, to forget what you did that night

I carry you everywhere with me

I see your cruel face in the mirror.

You have possessed my body

Turning it into a bloody wound

That weeps at the slightest touch

Your violence has carved a home inside my ribcage

And as the years past, I realised I’ve lost myself to the liquid contents

Of glass bottles with pretty labels.

They invite me in with large, welcoming arms

Promising me escape from this recurring nightmare

I welcome the relief

Like the sigh of spring on the pastel horizon

But I promise you this

I have vowed it to myself under the moonlight.

You will not be carved into my body forever

For each year, I painfully shed my skin

And you with it,

Your marks are beginning to fade

One day,

I will have the strength to put you down

And walk away

Just watch me, spread these broken wings

And catch flight,

Straight to the open sky.