Spun
But then she smiled at me...

The storm is raging again
I can feel the
Spiral taking hold,
This feeling so
Familiar, old
I'm cold
And I try
To stay within
The eye, but
It's so windy,
And I'm weak
From all the everything,
And I'm swept away,
Battered against the walls
Of regret
Of mistakes
Of fear
Of misses,
The life/love I'll never know,
And I'm cycling
Out of control
The storm has taken hold
And I'm in the dark
Trying to pull myself
Out, but I've lost sight
Of why,
And
I
fall
So
Far,
This pit is deep
And I am sinking,
Sobbing
Over all the faults
I see
In myself, in the world,
The future
I don't want to be in.
...
But then I see her…
She meets me where I am
And she smiles at me…
(At me?)
And she's so bright,
She lets the light in,
I can see again
And it's not so bad here.
She pulls
(Effortlessly, gracefully)
And I can see a way out
Of this cycle,
She steadies
And I have a focus–
And I know
I'm not supposed
To depend on
Anyone,
But, oh God
it's been so hard here
Alone.
Yes, I can pull myself up,
But sometimes it's
The loneliness
That sucks
Me in.
...
She moves through me,
Mending the broken pieces
That others left behind
So carelessly,
She does it with ease
Those hurts I thought
Permanent…
No, I know,
No one can ‘fix’ me.
But she holds me while
I work it through–
(And reminds me why
I even want to).
Suddenly, I
Believe
In what it means
To want to see
The sky.
About the Creator
Bex Jordan
They/She. Writer. Gardener. Cat-Lover. Nerd. Always looking up at the sky or down at the ground.
Profile photo by Román Anaya.
Bluesky: @umasabirah.bsky.social
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