Sporadic Feelings

I lost all of my essence & I can't feel at the moment,

Because my heart is torn asunder.

I take fully responsibility for all the pain & torment,

I deserve nothing less for the way I acted & made everything go under.

I just can't accept that I lost you,

But I know that I have.

It tears me apart to know that it's true,

That I won't have you as My Everything; My other & better half..

It kills My Soul to know that I hurt the one I love most,

Lord knows I never wanted for that to take place.

I just wanted to make you happy & to take note,

So I know how to keep you by my side & not to do it in haste.

I wanted to spend all of My Life with you & take our Time,

But I ruined what we had by not being benign,

& even though you were mine,

I would've done anything for you in a drop of a dime,

But instead of loving us in our prime,

I build a wall that you couldn't climb.

I made more than enough mistakes to realize that you are better off without me,

I should've just loved you & do anything & everything it takes to make you believe me.

Because I truly love you with my all & more than you know,

I just want to make you My Wife & make everything better all without sorrow.

I love you to the moon & back,

& want you all to myself.

Loving you is better than finding a needle in a hay stack,

Because you are my 1-in-a-billion; something worth more than my own health.

I can't function without you,

I am nothing without you too.

But everything is what I will do,

Just to have a chance to create something new.

A refreshing start to something greater than ourselves,

A love so pure that it resonates for all of our kids' generations.

The kind you want to capture pictures of & put them on shelves,

So they last all of eternity; something to give them like a sweet notation.

I always felt like people are better without me,

But for you I just want to be better.

So I hope in time you change your mind because you are all I need,

Because there is absolutely nothing more precious or sweeter.

You are the Love Of My Life,

My heart In human form.

So from now I will never have any kind of strife,

& it is you that I will never harm..