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She Used to Make Me Tea

Quadru-haiku

By Rayn BPublished 17 days ago Updated 17 days ago 1 min read
59

Flame and filled kettle

Mingle on the stove until

Air escapes the spout.

//

Liquid meets black leaves,

A dance of water and earth

In a mug ballroom.

//

Cream and sugar join…

She would make it extra sweet

Just the way I loved.

//

My brew tastes bitter

Since she left, and I cannot

Ask her ashes why.

nature poetrysad poetrylove poemsheartbreak
59

About the Creator

Rayn B

I have been writing poetry and lyrics since I was a child. I have recently started writing short scripts for “found footage” horror TikToks. I dream of writing books and full length screenplays. Thanks for being in this community with me!

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  3. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

Add your insights

Comments (30)

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  • Linda Marry3 days ago

    Now I want tea ;)

  • Junior11 days ago

    Nice :)

  • Allie Bickerton11 days ago

    Your poem brought me back to my table.. my table that used to be hers, where we shared tea and chocolate cake together. I imagine that she’s still with us, working in some cafe in Paris, but to me she’s gone. I’m afraid we’ve lost touch. Funny enough, she loves to write poems and encouraged me to join the scribophile community. I only did because of her, and now I feel like the whole purpose of me being here on Vocal, is to get close to her…even if it’s from afar and she doesn’t know it.

  • Rachel Rose13 days ago

    I like the transition from fantasy to stark reality.

  • Great Haiku, beautiful. Happy to subscribe to your work.

  • Feyre St. Clair14 days ago

    Wow. This is amazing 🙌🏻

  • PK Colleran14 days ago

    Beautiful. The last line struck a deep chord.... Thank you.

  • Janice Daily15 days ago

    Wow! This is such a powerful poem that effectively uses imagery, metaphor, and simple language to convey emotions. It is a poignant reminder of the power of loss and grief.

  • AU16 days ago

    lovely

  • Goran Vinchi16 days ago

    Great

  • JAYESH KUKREJA16 days ago

    very nice

  • Kim Sole16 days ago

    Very Nices

  • very nice lines

  • Oh my god, this is heartbreakingly beautiful. Thank you!

  • Mark Graham16 days ago

    For me this brings memories of my mom and how she made hot tea for me.

  • Marilyn Glover16 days ago

    Beautiful work! 🥰

  • Holy cow, this is so beautiful. Just sweeps us along in the lyric narrative.

  • sleepy drafts16 days ago

    This is absolutely beautiful. <3

  • All your tags for this poem are spot on.

  • Fiona Howell16 days ago

    Ooh, loved the ending!

  • Mary16 days ago

    The last line hits right in the feels.

  • Meg16 days ago

    Such a beautiful piece! Love the flow

  • Cathy holmes17 days ago

    omg. That last line hits hard. This is beautiful piece. Congrats on the top story.

  • Em Starrrrr17 days ago

    This is so poignant and beautiful, Rayn.

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