Reed Alexander's Literary Review of 'Just Break My Heart Already' (2020) by Chaire Michael Clemons

You know what was brilliant about the opening of this book? I feel like it needed a trigger warning. The narrator is so good at emulating that little voice of anxiety in my head; and if you don't have anxiety LIKE FUCKING ME, after this, you might. It's an excellent way to really set you off, and in this respect, set the mood.

The first chapter is a rambling mess, and I'm not being critical here, it's actually perfect. Even better, it has a sort of flow too it, an up and down if you will, with these clever little pauses that are like slaps to the face. Knowing a thing or two about what anxiety feels like, I can say it was captured quite well. It's not descriptive with the usual imagery but it locks you onto very simple thing, focusing on sight and smell, but most importantly, ideas.

This first story is just a short about someone who is afraid to fly, but what a way to open a collection of stories and poems. It really is very striking because poems are more about what you feel. This sets the readers nerves on edge at the very beginning of the collection, brilliantly setting the pace for what will come later in the read. You kind of want a fucking breather after the first short and this is what opens the first poem... 'stepping off the plane,' so to speak.

I should mention, once again, that I'm a terrible judge of poetry, because it's just not my bag. To be blunt, I hate poetry. I also dislike relationship drama... intensely. But I'm going to argue why both of those things are a good reason to buy this collection. It had both of these thing seriously going against it as I read, but I KEPT READING, that should tell you how strong the body of the content is.

You're not just reading some hipster slam poetry about a bad break-up, you're reading the anxieties of a person who has lived with monsters. The first part of this collection could very easily be a book of creature feature poems and the whole of the work, in many respects, similar to the Vagina Monologues in the seriousness of the content.

I absolutely recommend it's purchase. This collection has deep meaning. I may not fully appreciate it, but if you are a fan of poetry, if you have lived among monsters, you will feel this. Click the following link and consider picking up a copy: Just Break My Heart Already

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SPOILERS!!!

This book follows the plane ride with a murder. This murder victim is describing monsters, in grueling detail, with the first few poems.

What the poetry presents is several relationship, that sounds in all respect to be mentally and emotionally abusive. It emulates the opening story in a way, as these relationships are an emotional roller-coaster. The monster that murders the narrator would only care enough about it to keep dragging them back in. The narrator goes from emotionally starved, to full, to over stimulated, to starved again, and back before being consumed.

They become enthralled, ambivalent, numb, rekindled, hopeful, lost, drowning, burnt out, at one point describing themselves as a whisper. There are, at times, two separate moments that run side by side in the poems like an echo, one being a memory, the other almost like a whisper of what's left.

It's important for me to point out, that only the first poems are the brutal retelling of the blood soaked wake of a monster. Indeed, part two is mostly about being the other lover, being the second choice. And, at the risk of sounding jingoistic, is not very brutal, just sad. They speak of knowing that they are the outsider to a romance they will never enjoy, and while some themes and imagery tell of the dance of the crypt, its not like the monster the book opens with. These poems are no less powerful than the earlier, but I don't have the capacity to enjoy them. Perhaps you will.

The final chapter and collection appears to be an apology to the murder victim from the beginning of this book. A sort of, "I'm sorry you will be eaten by monsters." It a confession. But at this point, the whisper that runs along side these memories are now a loud echo, often being written in all caps. What I believe was once the whisper is now the narrator, a sort of becoming. That appears to be why the left side are memories, and the right side are a whispers. The whisper is what's to come.

Do give this collection a chance. I believe you will not regret it.