"I am not apologies. I will not apologize."
A four letter word.
What does it mean to live in spotlight?
The sun at your back,
on your face,
on your toes?
Loving the parts hidden in darkness begging to be free.
So you free them.
Let them roam wild, however that tastes.
Dress themselves in truth.
Red lipstick girls cloaked in cheetah print
Glide down the street with the secrets of the world in their pocket.
Like their words are made of diamonds.
I spurned them out of jealousy.
Because I couldn't hear the girl in the pit of my stomach screaming
Her metal cup running along the iron bars.
Her cell self made.
My name said with disappointment.
The message always,
"You're too much."
"You have too many feelings."
"When you express them it embarrasses me."
And I ate their embarrassment.
Every last bite until my truth drown in it.
Until all that was left was a set of lungs unable to take a breath.
I am not apologies.
I will not apologize.
For this body that takes up space.
For this voice that takes up sound.
For all the power and strength my words carry
And can carry
And will carry.
As I think them outloud
Feel them outloud
Write them outloud.
I am the girl in red lipstick cloaked in cheetah print.
With words made of diamonds.
One of the authentics.
Room for us all to shine.
About the Creator
I am an educational content writer, cat lover, and Ina Garten enthusiast. My creative non fiction essays have been published on Thought Catalog and Mogul. I am also a novelist and flash fiction writer.
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