My Nightmare

I felt a chill run slowly down my spine and suddenly my eyes were wide open. What was going on? Where was I? As I slowly moved my eyes left to right, then right to left, I saw nothing. I feel my heart pounding—thump thump...thump thump...thump thump...I slowly crossed my arms, grasping each elbow with my hands and then slowly lowering by body to a squat. My body started to rock back and forth, back and forth, my lips shivering from the cold air surrounding me. Not wanting to yell, I slowly and cautiously uttered "Hello!" I could hear the sound echo, hello, hello, hello, softer and softer until it is gone. Again, I softly utter "hello" and I hear nothing but the echo of my very own "hello." I continue to rock back and forth, back and forth. I rock in this pitch black, very cold dwelling. It's so difficult to breathe (gasp, gasp). A sound *slam* my heart jumps to the noise and my body is now still. I hear footsteps and keys rattling, they sound so loud! I'm so scared. Fear of another sort. My eyes begin to fill with tears and palms become moist with sweat and the the worst, you stood there. You looked at me with those shallow, dark—almost black eyes. They seemed so empty. I am seeing you, that black-haired man with a mole next to his nose, a black mustache, and a body of disgrace. You stood there piercing me with a god forsaken look that could only come from a man full of sickness and evil. The lights flickering behind you allow me to see myself naked and alone. I hustle by body into a corner of the room, eagerly trying to shield myself from you. I can feel the cold that comes from such a soulless person. I screamed for her: "Mother," again and again I hear my own screams, "Mom," "Mama please." Where was she? How long would I have to be left here with you? "Mama please," "mom." Nothing. I was terrified, shaking, crying, my heart racing, my head down in between my hands, trying to hide from you. My heart is pounding, faster and faster, thump,thump,thump,thump,thump...You started to move towards me, I yelled as loud as I could "mama please," and then I awoke.

This nightmare was my reality

from a man was sick indeed

A man who'd take my innocence

and still roams these streets, believe

The scared little girl in my nightmare

lives buried deep within

Keeping his secret was my mistake

but he lives knowing the nature of his sin

As a grown man, years past my age

what he did makes him very sick

I was just a child, immature

but it was me who he'd still pick

years and years have past on by

and with my life I did move on

memories so far buried

my whole childhood was gone

until recently an ugly reality of mine

would become that of another's

so fucken close to home, because

to this daughter I am her mother

My innocent baby girl will have to

live a nightmare like my own

also done to her by a very sick

man, his name I will leave unknown

so a nightmare re-occurred because it hit so close to home

I finally face my demons, so I won't allow hers to roam.