My Ludicrous Limericks Challenge

As the Ludicrous Limericks Challenge comes to a close, I’m happy Vocal came up with this one! My love for haikus have gone to another level, and now I think limericks will be added to my list of favorite writing styles. Many of the limericks I wrote were silly, but I also wanted to experiment with different types of humor, like dark humor and sarcasm. I think I actually got better the more I wrote. Some of my personal favorites are “Come Back Home,” “Between The Lines,” “Change For Change,” and “Potty Talk!” But, I’m biased. Just like the Time Capsule Challenge, I’ve compiled all my submissions here for everyone to read! Enjoy, and good luck to everyone looking to win this time around…

1. i Phone

My phone holds all my likes

Even holds all my secrets I write

It’s all that I own

So taking my phone

Would be like you’re taking my life…

2. Wild Child

Back then, Mama called me “Baby”

And “Beautiful,” “Goofy,” and “Amazing”

But, now that I’m older

And out of my stroller

You can imagine what she’s called me lately…

3. Herd A Sheep

Once the sheep are herded

The silence around you is perfect

If you want some advice

Say what they like

Till everyone heard it…

4. When You Date Yourself

I plan on not dating myself

I’m SURE I need somebody else,

Cause I think I’m too great

And NEVER make mistakes,

So, myself would need help with my self…

5. Go With The Flow

When Ella’s out of her element

She said the water takes care of it,

So when I lose me

I go to the sea,

And now I can feel what Ella meant…

6. Don’t Talk To Strangers

Yesterday mom said, “Don’t talk to strangers!”

Very loudly and with lots of anger,

Now my teacher is puzzled

Why in class I’m so muffled,

But, honestly, I know no one stranger…

7. Change For Change

My son asked me for some change

I told him that I want the same,

Now I pay commission

Whenever he listens,

Exchanging change for change…

*8. Come Back Home

Cages don’t make people better

Or sending love only in letters,

Too many locks

And friends in a box,

For sins that no one can measure…

9. Between The Lines

Lately I’ve been on the ropes

So I gave a palm reader my hope,

She reached for my hands

Quickly gave a glance,

And said Sir, what you need is soap…

10. Potty Talk

My two year old called me a Meany

She said BYE BYE DADDY I LEAVING!

But she won’t leave today

She’d stink as a stray,

She’s in diapers, she knows that she needs me…

11. The Press And The President

“VOTE FOR ME,” shouted the Democrat

“No, ME!” said a man after claps,

“TELL US WHAT’S YOUR PLANS!”

Yelled a man in the stands,

But, their plans weren’t to comment on that…