my double-edged sword

Goddess of the night, I love you so

Yet I will face you all the same

Your long golden hair spilled down your back in an endless wave, a waterfall

The wanton pride etched into the graceful lines of your face

How could one not want to know you?

You are timeless and all-encompassing, beauty encapsulated

With strength personified in every stride you take

With every raise of your slender hand, lingering in the wake of the open air

An entire village dies; a world is reborn

And you have nothing but a smile to show for it all

Rolling in the pain and anguish of the lesser like a pig in the mud

Sometimes I am sickened to know you

When your darkness shows too much for me to handle

When I can smell the blood caked in between your fingernails

When I can hear the bone snap between your teeth

When you smile out of cruelty, and it is as beautiful as any smile of love could be

I know you hide your softness because it scares you

And it’s been long buried now below the surface, an ancient grave

The hilt of your blade glows a dull golden brown where your fingers curl around it

And all I can see is silver and sunlight

You wish to kill me, to pierce my heart

For it is the only way you can come close to it now

If I die today, would you hold my throbbing heart in your open palm and feel me pulse?

Feel me beat for you, even in death

My dear, I would bleed myself dry for you and your endless violence

It is all you know; why should I resent you for it?

I should resent myself for not trying hard enough to make you see

What I can make out still, what lies deep within you—

A stillness, a contemplation such as yours, is not a curse, is not weakness

Rather, it is resilience; it is survival of the fittest

It is love, the only way we can know it

How can I reach into your body and save you from yourself?

You will say you don’t need to be saved

As you are sloshed and bathed in unsureness and shame disguised as fury

And I ache for you

I ache, too, for the corpses strewn along this floor at your hand

Who died grasping at their throats

I ache the same for the hurt you feel and inflict

Knowing you is a culmination of misery and love, a vicious double-edged sword wielded

Loving you is knowing I could never forget the pain of setting you free from yourself

Everything you do is a blade in my back

Everything you touch is worth mourning for

Perhaps you were lost from the beginning, gone

With a dull fate of vengeance and rage awaiting the both of us

Fated enemies at the end of the line when being lovers fell away and apart

Disintegrating like sand, falling out and away through my fingers

I shed a tear for the you I created and the you I see now before me

For it is both I cannot quite let go of

To face you is to throw myself away; see me jump and plummet down

—

So… does anyone else write poetry based on fictional characters they’ve created? 😂♥️