Lost and found

MISUNDERSTOOD/DOOTSREDNUSIM

they said they'd understand , they said they'd listen, then why am I still misunderstood?

feeling, that no one hears me , so I became silent,

thinking that no one would understand me so I became violent,

not caring about what's around me nor within,

becoming numb to the world , with no means to an end,

am I dirty ? , what is to become of me , who am I?,

crawling threw the world, feeling unsatisfied,

denied by the one's I love, because of my past,

reminded it of everyday, time fly's by and I watch as it pass,

crying my heart out yet no one listens, no one hears,

surrounded by, judgement, clouded by fears,

afraid to live, because I've become unsusceptible to change,

locked in a place where, my own reflection seems strange,

who am I?, why do I live through some much pain and misery,

losing everyone around me cause I've become my own company,

what?, life ?, what about, we've been out of touch since it began,

me, myself and I have become, my only friends,

but also my worst enemy, so I call upon god,

I dare not question him, against any and all odds,

he listens, and doesn't judge me, but accepts me thru and thru,

I turn and ask the lord what shall I do?,

that's a journey I'll soon come to understand I start to see,

caused by unfortunate events , that have matured me,

I feel, anger inside of me, ready to combust,

caught in temptation, feeling the emptiness with lust,

I've become one within myself in the silence ,

distancing myself in my mind on a far away island,

the world has turned its back on me and made me cold,

its hard to love, understand, making it hard me to mold,

in this darkness I find myself, alone but....at peace,

where all my anger and anxiety , seems to cease,

I've become aware that sometimes peace within startles me,

a tear fall's, and it all becomes plain to see,

my fear, and anger, have pulled me from reality,

making it hard for me to accept change,

the light shines through breaking what once seemed strange,

and I see my self reflecting , in the window pane heart begins to pound ,

caught in my own eye's, looking back at me now,

I'm trapped within my own confinement and threw away the key,

the problem , has to be fixed starting with not the world, but me!

clouded once by, doing what wasn't good,

only accept that I can't, and not that I could,

sitting here facing the cold reality,

that I was the one, that really, never understood me!