losing you

theses are ones i have written and wanna see how people feel about them

Some days are like torcher.

just downright unfair.

To lose your mother some cannot bear.

I use the pain to keep me sane.

It shows me my heart remains

where my biggest part of me once stood is empty

its heart breaking, I swear.

You never failed to make me see the truth ,

My soft when I was grain

Your words will never leave my brain.

I hope to hold your voice for ever to play it when life begins to rain down on me ,

because scared is what I’ll be

without you by my side.

They will continue to lead me through life to guide me when I’m unsure I know I can look up and think of you. you always knew just what to do.

The children will always know about your ways,

from your 3 biggest fans to the two who were too young too.

They will continue to learn and get love from you

they will always know the amazing grandmother they have,

I’ll tell them are adventures and your heart of gold that shines tremendously bright.

Till my dying day I owe this to you!

They will learn from you as you taught me.

Respect, love and honesty.

the courage of the rich and the kindness of the poor

The strength to know which is which,

with you watching over nothing can go wrong.

Cause with you ill always stand strong.

Soon my heart will be at peace once.

Before it does, I need to speak.

Some regret will always be, Because of mistakes.

I am sorry for times of hurt we have faced,

I'm sorry for the times I withdrew.

I should of hid my tears and fear away for you,

behind a smiling face hiding the blue,

even though knowing there was nothing I could do.

I realized way to late that I should have stood by you more than I got to.

But more than anything

It was extremely hard,

To see all this, happen to you.

I’ll never forget the feelings and helplessness to see the most important part of my life fade as I stood there feeling paralyzed with such extreme pain & heart ache. Watching what you went through the reality hit me and just grew.

coming to terms we were losing you.

This life will be dull without the glue that kept us together threw time and time again from ups and downs an unsolid ground we always knew we were okay because we had you.

Never will there be someone who can fill those shoes. You know everything about us even when we couldn’t see it you knew , no matter the problem you saved me threw it all even when I thought I knew it all

When I got the message, you left that morning I knew you held on to meet my two.

I'm sorry mama

I’m sorry that it didn’t come true.

I'll carry these forever and make it up to all of you!

dear mama please don’t fret.

Just lay your head to rest.

We’ll continue to make you proud mama as proud as you can be,

Just watch us go and you will see,

grasping life in our hands with only conquer and defeat.

I've learnt so much in my time with you, there isn't any words that could say more of a thank you

precious memories will never fade,

In our hearts and soul, you will be tucked away safe.

Soon enough are family chain will be whole again,

But not until we meet again.

♥mama

I love you♥

Learned to late

There Is always that one person,

or maybe even a few people that you cross paths with,

that make an impact on us in our journey called life.

weather it be a good or bad situation it is you that can make the outcome your own,

Live the life you deserve.

You are who you are,

it’s the path you take and decisions and strength to know what to do with perseverance.

To make the right turn ,

that makes you who you are in the end

fight with hope , fight with passion , fight with love but never let greed block you or send you astray.

then soon enough you will succeed.

Just always remember to make your time worth while,

cause not everyone is blessed with the time, we all deserve and need.

So always cherish love and its precious time,

never forgetting that life is short .

Some of the times are abrupt turns that cut deep.

I was not so lucky

but now beginning to see.

The pain of loss that I have is worse then words could repeat.

With out a hello with out a good bye just sent away to fly so high with out a warning to help me see the reasoning for such a heart breaking scene .

I will always love them ,

I will always have them close to me,

but never will I get to feel the hugs. Hear their voice,

or share the time they should have had .

Along with me fighting the demons in me.

Addiction is the hardest to beat no matter the substance it makes you filled with greed not to mention the numbness from emotions that make us not see that time is ticking and we are not were we need to be.

Spending yours or their last moments together.

I now have to wear it every day that I chose my addiction instead of doing and

going where I was supposed to be.

I waited to long,

I learned to late and now

I have to deal with the tragic fate wearing it forever ,

as If it were a necklace.