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Leather

Home. Home? Home.

By Amanda KellyPublished 3 years ago Updated 3 years ago 2 min read
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Leather
Photo by Felipe Santana on Unsplash

Two gasps as we walked through the door;

“I can see us living here,” we chorused.

A year-long search,

A perfect home.

We made it our own.

-

We filled our bedroom with blues.

We promised we’d do that, in Fiji.

A space of tranquility.

A respite from life.

We play man and wife.

-

This year was leather.

July twenty-first.

Of the three dates,

It would be the worst.

-

Early morning, the sun barely up

Surrounded by turquoise and teal,

The whole day ahead,

We snuggled in bed.

I realized that I didn’t feel

Safe.

-

Pain and white light.

Something was wrong.

My body didn’t belong

To me anymore.

I stumbled out

Of our beautiful room

Into the bathroom

And sat on the floor.

-

I started to shake

From my head to my toes.

I screamed you awake

As I entered the throes

Of convulsions and then

You were saying “Oh God!”

Next thing I knew men

Had carried me out

To a stretcher in front

Of our beautiful house.

-

“No blood in your brain.”

That’s what they said

After reviewing

The scans of my head.

“Buy a lottery ticket,”

A doctor’s cliché

To explain that one’s lucky

They’re alive today.

-

Both carotids were closed

Ninety-nine percent.

They scheduled a surgeon

To insert some stents.

-

“We promise you won’t

Remember a thing.”

That might have been true,

If not for me waking,

Strapped down to the table,

And nobody knew.

They were working inside me

But I couldn’t do

Anything. Not move, or talk.

I just had to lay there,

Terrified and in shock.

-

Four days, in total,

Spent in ICU.

On Sunday they said,

“We’re discharging you!”

-

Home. I came home.

But it wasn’t the same.

There, was the bed

Where I first felt the pain.

And there, the hardwood

Bathroom floor,

Where I didn’t know

If I’d see you anymore.

-

It’s been over a month, now.

Some good days, some bad.

I try to be normal.

Try not to be sad.

Sometimes it’s hard

To believe it was real.

And sometimes I still

Struggle to feel

Safe.

-

But you’re there by my side.

On the good days, and bad.

We’re in this together,

We’re making it through.

And now, I realize, that my “home” is you.

love poems
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About the Creator

Amanda Kelly

The written word is a beautiful medium.

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